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Out of His Mind: The Jack Thompson Story


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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 05:42 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Here's how it works: We each take turns coming up with a line to Jack Thompson's life story. Here's mine:

"Thompson's vendetta against video games started when at a young age, little Jackie was violated in elementary school when his gym teacher shoved a Zapper up his ass."


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Tishwitch
Title: PornStarExtraordinaire
Joined: Jul 01 2006
Location: Winter Wonderland
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 05:57 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Oh no my friend, you're wrong there!

"Thompson's hostility springs from in utero! During the second trimester, his mother accidentally sat on a joystick, which happened to poke poor Thompson in the eye! From that day forth, he knew what he had to do..."


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TheRoboSleuth
Title: Sleuth Mark IV
Joined: Aug 08 2006
Location: The Gritty Future
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 06:43 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Even farther back:

In about 1623 or so, an insignificant puritan lawyer and ancestor of Jack Tompson led and was ultimately responsible for the death of a young woman, whom he accused of ruining the crops with witchcraft. Alas, he had incriminated the wrong person, and the young woman's sister, a genuine witch, took vengeance. His descendentin the far future would be cursed to A) make the same mistake that his ancestor did, blaming the wrong thing for a social ill, and B) hungering for man-cock.

Keep in mind, this is all true.


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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 06:49 pm Reply with quote Back to top

That one wins, hands down.


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Tishwitch
Title: PornStarExtraordinaire
Joined: Jul 01 2006
Location: Winter Wonderland
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 07:47 pm Reply with quote Back to top

My people get blamed for everything!



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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 07:51 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Hey, your ancestor had no idea what she was doing. She probably meant for him to be against consumer health advocates, or something.


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Knyte
2010 SLF Tag Champ*
Title: Curator Of The VGM
Joined: Nov 01 2006
Location: Here I am.
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 08:27 pm Reply with quote Back to top

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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 08:32 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Damn, he looks like "If Willy Wonka was 50 years older and a douchebag".


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jonnymorgue
Title: Nothing Special
Joined: Oct 25 2006
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 08:33 pm Reply with quote Back to top

He looks like he's taking a zapper in the ass.
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 08:35 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Heeeeere's Jonny!


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Chrisby
Joined: Mar 31 2006
Location: Where my computer is.
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 09:54 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Jack Thompson eats babies.
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 09:59 pm Reply with quote Back to top

But first, he has sex with them.


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Decoy
Title: !
Joined: Aug 29 2006
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 10:55 pm Reply with quote Back to top

And before that, he microwaves them.


A shovel and a complete lack of ethics can get you anything.
 
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DarkMaze
Joined: Feb 24 2006
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 10:58 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Decoy wrote:
And before that, he microwaves them.

MICROWAVING BABIES?! That's a CRIME!!! Shocked

I mean, god, that's like baking sushi. You eat the suckers raw. Rolling Eyes
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
PostPosted: Jan 10 2007 10:59 pm Reply with quote Back to top

With Explosion Sauce.

Explosion Sauce: It's good on its own.


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Dr. Jeebus
Moderator
Title: SLF Harbinger of Death
Joined: Sep 03 2005
Location: Wakefield, MA
PostPosted: Jan 11 2007 12:26 am Reply with quote Back to top

Jack Thompson looks like Donald Trump after 30 years of smoking...and taking it up the ass.


dr.jeebus.sydlexia.com - Updated sometimes, but on hiatus!
UsaSatsui wrote:
The three greatest heels in history...Andy Kaufman, Triple H, and Dr. Jeebus

 
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Knyte
2010 SLF Tag Champ*
Title: Curator Of The VGM
Joined: Nov 01 2006
Location: Here I am.
PostPosted: Jan 11 2007 01:02 am Reply with quote Back to top

I think he looks like Jon Stewart wearing "old man" makeup. Like Jon Stewart was doing a skit making fun of Jack Thompson. Maybe it's just me.
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
PostPosted: Jan 11 2007 09:28 am Reply with quote Back to top

He looks like the 90-year old mutant lovechild of Jon Stewart and the Bride of Frankenstein.


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Decoy
Title: !
Joined: Aug 29 2006
PostPosted: Jan 11 2007 06:07 pm Reply with quote Back to top

He looks like a Ronald McDonald without the makeup, and has been addicted to crack for 20 years.


A shovel and a complete lack of ethics can get you anything.
 
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Gushoshin
Title: guardian of death
Joined: Feb 27 2006
Location: Washington State
PostPosted: Jan 13 2007 02:36 am Reply with quote Back to top

one of my friends actully LIKES J T and his bed buddy Al Gore.

I wish I could upgrade my friends.
G.


Steve Gavazzi, Marc Green
Jon Sly! It's time to play... WHICH DOUCHEBAG SAID THIS????

"I'm curious -- which mountain climber was used in Cliff Hangers?"


Happy anniversary you fucking wankers!
 
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