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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
Posts: 7542
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Here's how it works: We each take turns coming up with a line to Jack Thompson's life story. Here's mine:
"Thompson's vendetta against video games started when at a young age, little Jackie was violated in elementary school when his gym teacher shoved a Zapper up his ass."
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Tishwitch
Title: PornStarExtraordinaire
Joined: Jul 01 2006
Location: Winter Wonderland
Posts: 1409
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Oh no my friend, you're wrong there!
"Thompson's hostility springs from in utero! During the second trimester, his mother accidentally sat on a joystick, which happened to poke poor Thompson in the eye! From that day forth, he knew what he had to do..."
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TheRoboSleuth
Title: Sleuth Mark IV
Joined: Aug 08 2006
Location: The Gritty Future
Posts: 2739
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Even farther back:
In about 1623 or so, an insignificant puritan lawyer and ancestor of Jack Tompson led and was ultimately responsible for the death of a young woman, whom he accused of ruining the crops with witchcraft. Alas, he had incriminated the wrong person, and the young woman's sister, a genuine witch, took vengeance. His descendentin the far future would be cursed to A) make the same mistake that his ancestor did, blaming the wrong thing for a social ill, and B) hungering for man-cock.
Keep in mind, this is all true.
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
Posts: 7542
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That one wins, hands down.
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Tishwitch
Title: PornStarExtraordinaire
Joined: Jul 01 2006
Location: Winter Wonderland
Posts: 1409
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My people get blamed for everything!
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
Posts: 7542
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Hey, your ancestor had no idea what she was doing. She probably meant for him to be against consumer health advocates, or something.
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Knyte
2010 SLF Tag Champ*
Title: Curator Of The VGM
Joined: Nov 01 2006
Location: Here I am.
Posts: 6749
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
Posts: 7542
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Damn, he looks like "If Willy Wonka was 50 years older and a douchebag".
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jonnymorgue
Title: Nothing Special
Joined: Oct 25 2006
Posts: 396
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He looks like he's taking a zapper in the ass.
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
Posts: 7542
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Chrisby
Joined: Mar 31 2006
Location: Where my computer is.
Posts: 1262
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Jack Thompson eats babies.
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
Posts: 7542
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But first, he has sex with them.
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Decoy
Title: !
Joined: Aug 29 2006
Posts: 87
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And before that, he microwaves them.
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 A shovel and a complete lack of ethics can get you anything. |
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DarkMaze
Joined: Feb 24 2006
Posts: 2578
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Decoy wrote: |
And before that, he microwaves them. |
MICROWAVING BABIES?! That's a CRIME!!!
I mean, god, that's like baking sushi. You eat the suckers raw.
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
Posts: 7542
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With Explosion Sauce.
Explosion Sauce: It's good on its own.
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Dr. Jeebus
Moderator
Title: SLF Harbinger of Death
Joined: Sep 03 2005
Location: Wakefield, MA
Posts: 5228
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Knyte
2010 SLF Tag Champ*
Title: Curator Of The VGM
Joined: Nov 01 2006
Location: Here I am.
Posts: 6749
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I think he looks like Jon Stewart wearing "old man" makeup. Like Jon Stewart was doing a skit making fun of Jack Thompson. Maybe it's just me.
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Char Aznable
Title: Char Classic™
Joined: Jul 24 2006
Location: Robot Boombox HQ
Posts: 7542
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He looks like the 90-year old mutant lovechild of Jon Stewart and the Bride of Frankenstein.
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Decoy
Title: !
Joined: Aug 29 2006
Posts: 87
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He looks like a Ronald McDonald without the makeup, and has been addicted to crack for 20 years.
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 A shovel and a complete lack of ethics can get you anything. |
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Gushoshin
Title: guardian of death
Joined: Feb 27 2006
Location: Washington State
Posts: 135
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one of my friends actully LIKES J T and his bed buddy Al Gore.
I wish I could upgrade my friends.
G.
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 Steve Gavazzi, Marc Green
Jon Sly! It's time to play... WHICH DOUCHEBAG SAID THIS????
"I'm curious -- which mountain climber was used in Cliff Hangers?"
Happy anniversary you fucking wankers! |
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