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Posted: Jul 27 2011 10:44 am

I've noticed sometimes I say things that aren't really what I mean. Not in a malicious sort of way, and not really lying either, but...

Okay, an example:

I'll play Power Ball and Mega Millions each week. If I hit a few bucks on them, I'll bring them down to the convenience store or the supermarket to cash them. But when I bring them to the desk, I don't say, "Gimme money!". Instead, I say, "Can you check these for me?"

Now I don't need them "checked", I KNOW they won. But it's just more polite to ask to check them.

Posted: Jul 27 2011 11:49 am

I often threaten friends with rape when they are displeasing me.

I also often declare my willingness to punch a baby to get something I want (example: "I'd punch a baby for an ice cream sandwich right now")

Posted: Jul 27 2011 01:47 pm

Ice2SeeYou wrote:

I often threaten friends with rape when they are displeasing me.

I also often declare my willingness to punch a baby to get something I want (example: "I'd punch a baby for an ice cream sandwich right now")

But you mean those things don't you?

Joined: Aug 04 2009 Posts: 2515

Here's one from IRC but i guess it's more of, saying it out of order seemed like i was saying something i didn't mean to say.

TheGreatPumpkin: Beachbum if i get that item that allows you to invade other players world do you get to choose who you invade.
TheFlamingSchnitzel: uh, no, but being married at my age is Razz

TheGreatPumpkin: really? i know quite a lot of people my age who are engaged.
BeachBum: No it invades a random person not in soul form
TheGreatPumpkin: nooooooooooo
TheFlamingSchnitzel: pumpkin
TheFlamingSchnitzel: i'm 17
TheGreatPumpkin: i would be all over you lol
TheGreatPumpkin: i'm 21 - it's not that big an age gap.
joshwoodzy: o_o
TheGreatPumpkin: OH GOD
TheFlamingSchnitzel: 21 is more reasonable than 17
BeachBum: lol
TheGreatPumpkin: NO I MEAN BEACHBUM I'D BE ALL OVER YOU IN DEMON SOULS
joshwoodzy: LOL
TheFlamingSchnitzel: lol
TheGreatPumpkin: what have i done
BeachBum: hahaha
TheFlamingSchnitzel: Wink

joshwoodzy: Why don't you have a seat over there
TheGreatPumpkin: curls into a ball
TheGreatPumpkin: ohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgod

Posted: Jul 27 2011 02:54 pm

Mr. Spidersquid wrote:

Ice2SeeYou wrote:

I often threaten friends with rape when they are displeasing me.

I also often declare my willingness to punch a baby to get something I want (example: "I'd punch a baby for an ice cream sandwich right now")

But you mean those things don't you?

Sometimes I don't.

Posted: Jul 27 2011 04:32 pm

Syd Lexia wrote:

I've noticed sometimes I say things that aren't really what I mean. Not in a malicious sort of way, and not really lying either, but...

Okay, an example:

I'll play Power Ball and Mega Millions each week. If I hit a few bucks on them, I'll bring them down to the convenience store or the supermarket to cash them. But when I bring them to the desk, I don't say, "Gimme money!". Instead, I say, "Can you check these for me?"

Now I don't need them "checked", I KNOW they won. But it's just more polite to ask to check them.

this reminds me of your Catholic Guilt threads

Posted: Jul 27 2011 04:48 pm

Sometimes I say, "Yeah it's cool," when I really mean "God I'd give my left arm for a meteor to strike you dead right now so I didn't have to put up with this shit from you anymore."

Posted: Jul 27 2011 09:36 pm

I would punch someone who threatened to rape me, either in a joking manner or in all seriousness.

Banned Joined: Sep 13 2008 Posts: 3129

Whenever I help someone at work sometimes when they mess up I'll say "Don't worry about it"

What I really mean is "Thanks for making my job harder"

Posted: Jul 30 2011 04:06 am

Hacker wrote:

Whenever I help someone at work sometimes when they mess up I'll say "Don't worry about it"

What I really mean is "Thanks for making my job harder"

I'd like to replace "Thanks for making my job so much harder" with "Thanks for not doing the job you are certified to do because you don't give a fuck".

Banned Joined: Sep 13 2008 Posts: 3129

Blackout wrote:

Hacker wrote:

Whenever I help someone at work sometimes when they mess up I'll say "Don't worry about it"

What I really mean is "Thanks for making my job harder"

I'd like to replace "Thanks for making my job so much harder" with "Thanks for not doing the job you are certified to do because you don't give a fuck".

I was referring to guests (what I'm supposed to call customers) but I guess that holds true for coworkers as well

Wizard Joined: Jun 12 2009 Posts: 4209

"I hope you get better" as opposed to "I hope you rot in a hole you saccharine bitch."

Posted: Jul 31 2011 02:23 pm

I sometimes i say "Fuck" and actually mean "Mashed Potatoes with Sausages".

Posted: Jul 31 2011 02:30 pm

Even though I really, really try hard not to do it, I still sometimes say "I'm fine" when what I'm really saying is "I'm pissed as fuck and you're the cause but you're too stupid to figure it out and I don't feel like getting in to it with you right now."

Posted: Jul 31 2011 03:19 pm

aika wrote:

Even though I really, really try hard not to do it, I still sometimes say "I'm fine" when what I'm really saying is "I'm pissed as fuck and you're the cause but you're too stupid to figure it out and I don't feel like getting in to it with you right now."

Good to know I'm not the only person who does this, but it's not just when I'm pissed at someone. It's also if that person made me sad or something along those lines.

Posted: Jul 31 2011 03:23 pm

I'm always like that. There just "WHO THE FUCK CARES?" written on my forehead in big bright letters.

Posted: Aug 01 2011 08:46 am

Sometimes I genuinely mean it, but a lot of the time when I ask "How was your weekend?" it really means "I have no idea what else to say to you. We work for the same company, but that's about all we have in common, and I'm really just looking for an 'It was good' from you."

Posted: Aug 01 2011 12:09 pm

aika wrote:

Even though I really, really try hard not to do it, I still sometimes say "I'm fine" when what I'm really saying is "I'm pissed as fuck and you're the cause but you're too stupid to figure it out and I don't feel like getting in to it with you right now."

All females are genetically programmed to do this.

Joined: Dec 06 2007 Location: Connecticut Posts: 11244

Ice2SeeYou wrote:

aika wrote:

Even though I really, really try hard not to do it, I still sometimes say "I'm fine" when what I'm really saying is "I'm pissed as fuck and you're the cause but you're too stupid to figure it out and I don't feel like getting in to it with you right now."

All females are genetically programmed to do this.

Passive aggressiveness is a female prime directive?

Posted: Aug 01 2011 02:35 pm

As far as women are concerned there are several things a woman might say to a man that mean something else, as far as I have learned over the years.

"I'm fine" or "Nothing" definitely means something major and is a warning to the guy that it is going to come back later and there will likely be an argument at some point.

When arguing or debating and a woman says "Fine" it means you should probably shut up because she thinks she is right and you are wrong and she wants you to shut up immediately.

"Go ahead" is a woman's way of daring a man and is not her giving you permission to do whatever it is you are asking her you can or want to do. If you accept the dare and do what you wanted, expect an argument later.

"Whatever" basically means "Fuck you."

When apologizing to a woman and she says "That's ok" it means she is thinking about when and how you will pay for a mistake you have made. It almost always comes back later.

I am sure there are many more examples such as these, but this is what I could come up with tight now and it is a pain in the ass to type more with one hand.

Posted: Aug 01 2011 03:47 pm

lol, this quickly turned into a "women dont know what the fuck they are saying" thread.
"its not what you said, its what you didnt say" WHAT!??!

Posted: Aug 01 2011 04:41 pm

username wrote:

lol, this quickly turned into a "women dont know what the fuck they are saying" thread.
"its not what you said, its what you didnt say" WHAT!??!

My post was not intended to be taken that way. The things I posted are things women say that have meaning they understand, and that men do not often understand. I am fairly certain that when a woman says one of the things I posted, she is saying what she means. They are more like traps, really.

Wizard Joined: Jun 12 2009 Posts: 4209

atomjacked wrote:

I am fairly certain that when a woman says one of the things I posted, she is saying what she means. They are more like traps, really.

See, things like that are what made it so that I don't feel like ever getting married. I wouldn't be able to cope with secret codes that resulted in my imminent demise.

Posted: Aug 04 2011 02:16 am

Women are tricky. Just remember: you are always wrong or you just don't give a fuck, there is no in between. Logic is not a part of the female brain(this is mostly a joke but kinda not).

Posted: Aug 04 2011 02:24 am

Yeah, logic would be too fucking simple i suppose.