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HardcoreGamer4Ever
Title: I Am The God Of Awesome
Joined: Jun 28 2010
Location: Your Mom's Vagina!
Posts: 1298
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Simply, just make the lamest, stupidest, most nonsensical jokes ever. I'll start.
Q: What do you call a bank robber who robs banks?
A: A bank robber.
Hahahahahahaha! Get it? A bank robber? You know, because he robs banks? 
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 https://badassgorilla.blogspot.com/
Yo yo yo, check out my new(ish) site!
RIP Happy Katana (2010-2020) |
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sidewaydriver
2010 SLF Tag Champ
Title: ( ͡� 
Joined: May 11 2008
Posts: 6160
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Two guys walk into a bar, the third guy ducks.
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Shake it, Quake it, Space Kaboom. |
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aeonic
Title: Sporadic Poster
Joined: Nov 19 2009
Location: Kissimmee, FL
Posts: 2747
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A perennial favorite
Q: Knock Knock
A: Who's there
Q: Go fuck yourself
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Who likes role-playing games? Me. Way too goddamn much. |
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HardcoreGamer4Ever
Title: I Am The God Of Awesome
Joined: Jun 28 2010
Location: Your Mom's Vagina!
Posts: 1298
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How bout this:
Knock Knock?
Who's There?
Fuck.
Fuck Who?
Fuck You!
Knock Knock?
Who's There?
Who.
Who Who?
Shut up, you goddamn owl!
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https://badassgorilla.blogspot.com/
Yo yo yo, check out my new(ish) site!
RIP Happy Katana (2010-2020) |
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FNJ
2010 SLF Tag Champ
Joined: Jun 07 2006
Posts: 12294
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you know what's funny?
women's rights.
seriously. you give them permission to vote, and tehy start thinking their real people or something.
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FNJ
2010 SLF Tag Champ
Joined: Jun 07 2006
Posts: 12294
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knock kknock
whho's there?
9/11
9/11 who?
I thught you said we'd never forget?
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FNJ
2010 SLF Tag Champ
Joined: Jun 07 2006
Posts: 12294
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what do you call a bouncer at a gay bar?
a flamethrower.
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Blackout
Title: Captain Oblivious
Joined: Sep 01 2007
Location: That Rainy State
Posts: 10376
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This will be even lamer since it doesn't quite work via text.
Q: What do you call a cross between an elephant and a rhino?
A: Eliphino!
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HardcoreGamer4Ever
Title: I Am The God Of Awesome
Joined: Jun 28 2010
Location: Your Mom's Vagina!
Posts: 1298
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Blackout
Title: Captain Oblivious
Joined: Sep 01 2007
Location: That Rainy State
Posts: 10376
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Klimbatize
2010 NES Champ
Title: 2011 Picnic/Death Champ
Joined: Mar 15 2010
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 5000
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HardcoreGamer4Ever
Title: I Am The God Of Awesome
Joined: Jun 28 2010
Location: Your Mom's Vagina!
Posts: 1298
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| Blackout wrote: |
| I don't get it... |
Because, instead of butter, it's slutter. You know, because it gets fucked alot. Haaaaa Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha. Hoo hoo ho hee haw!
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https://badassgorilla.blogspot.com/
Yo yo yo, check out my new(ish) site!
RIP Happy Katana (2010-2020) |
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Blackout
Title: Captain Oblivious
Joined: Sep 01 2007
Location: That Rainy State
Posts: 10376
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Yeah, but who is fucking popcorn? I could make the joke with god damn toast!
Q: What do you put on toast that gets fucked a lot?
A: Get your dick out of my toaster you freak!
HA HA HA.
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Klimbatize
2010 NES Champ
Title: 2011 Picnic/Death Champ
Joined: Mar 15 2010
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 5000
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Well, it does say "Lame Joke" in the title of the thread.
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sidewaydriver
2010 SLF Tag Champ
Title: ( ͡� 
Joined: May 11 2008
Posts: 6160
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Q: Why did the man throw his clock out the window?
A: Because he stashed cocain in his clock and the police were at his door to answer a domestic violence report because he and his crack whore girlfriend got into a fight because she was snorting up most of the product he was trying to sell but got pissed and tried to attack him with a box cutter and he accidently pushed her down the stairs while defending himself so she ran off and called the cops so he had to hurry up and ditch the stash but couldn't flush it down the toilet because it was backed up due to an at home abortion they performed earlier that morning because of all the unprotected sex they had while coked up which also attributed to both of them having syphilis so now in a panic he threw the clock out the window hoping it'll land in the dumpster in the alley below his apartment building but unfortunately he was unaware of the squad car parked next to the alley and the cop in the squad car noticed this so the dude was busted anyway for domestic violence and also for various drug charges and also because he took a swing at a cop when they tried to take him in while his crack whore girlfriend shacked up with some other coke dealer who didn't take her bullshit and ended up cutting her head off and throwing her in the river meanwhile the first guy was awaiting trial but he ended up hanging himself in his jail cell because he was a little bitch and felt there was no way he could handle doing time in prison.
I also would have accepted: "Because he wanted to see time fly."
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Shake it, Quake it, Space Kaboom. |
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HardcoreGamer4Ever
Title: I Am The God Of Awesome
Joined: Jun 28 2010
Location: Your Mom's Vagina!
Posts: 1298
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Q: When does money fall from the sky?
A: When there's a change in the weather.
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https://badassgorilla.blogspot.com/
Yo yo yo, check out my new(ish) site!
RIP Happy Katana (2010-2020) |
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UsaSatsui
Title: The White Rabbit
Joined: May 25 2008
Location: Hiding
Posts: 7565
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Once upon a time, there was a man who wanted to build a house. But, being a little eccentric, he wanted to build the house using only 99 bricks. So he went to the hardware store and said, "Hello, I'd like to buy 99 bricks."
The owner of the store told him, "I'm sorry, we only sell bricks in quantities of 100."
"Can't you cut me a deal or something?" the man asked.
"Nope, sorry," replied the owner. So the guy bought 100 bricks.
He took the bricks back to his lot, and he built a house using 99 bricks. Now, if you do the math, 100 minus 99 is 1, so he had one brick left. And he took that brick, and he just chucked it, way up in the air!
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SNESGuy
Title: El Duderino
Joined: Jul 31 2010
Location: Da D.C
Posts: 1831
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| sidewaydriver wrote: |
Q: Why did the man throw his clock out the window?
A: Because he stashed cocain in his clock and the police were at his door to answer a domestic violence report because he and his crack whore girlfriend got into a fight because she was snorting up most of the product he was trying to sell but got pissed and tried to attack him with a box cutter and he accidently pushed her down the stairs while defending himself so she ran off and called the cops so he had to hurry up and ditch the stash but couldn't flush it down the toilet because it was backed up due to an at home abortion they performed earlier that morning because of all the unprotected sex they had while coked up which also attributed to both of them having syphilis so now in a panic he threw the clock out the window hoping it'll land in the dumpster in the alley below his apartment building but unfortunately he was unaware of the squad car parked next to the alley and the cop in the squad car noticed this so the dude was busted anyway for domestic violence and also for various drug charges and also because he took a swing at a cop when they tried to take him in while his crack whore girlfriend shacked up with some other coke dealer who didn't take her bullshit and ended up cutting her head off and throwing her in the river meanwhile the first guy was awaiting trial but he ended up hanging himself in his jail cell because he was a little bitch and felt there was no way he could handle doing time in prison.
I also would have accepted: "Because he wanted to see time fly." |
Dude that was deep
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SoldierHawk
Moderator
Title: Warrior-Poet
Joined: Jan 15 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 6113
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| FNJ wrote: |
knock kknock
whho's there?
9/11
9/11 who?
I thught you said we'd never forget? |
 That one is so bad it's awesome.
Alright, I've got a longer joke for you, but it's equally bad:
This frog goes into a bank. He hops up onto the desk of a loan manager, slams his little fist in front of her and demands, "I want a loan!"
The woman gives him a rather funny look--talking frog you know--but recovers nicely. "My name is Patricia Black, Mr. Frog," she says. "How much will you be needing, and do you have any collateral?"
The frog answers, "ten thousand dollars, and here's my collateral." He opens up a sack he's been holding, and dumps a large amount of ridiculous and rather ugly ceramic figurines onto the desk.
Our loan agent looks at them dubiously, then stands and excuses herself. "I'm...going to have to talk to my manager," she says, before going into the back room area to talk to her boss.
"What do you want, Patty?" her boss growls as she knocks on his office door.
"Uh, sir, there's a frog on my desk and he wants a loan. You'd better come have a look at this."
Grumbling, the boss stands up and follows her back to the main part of the bank. "So, frog," he says, eyeing the creature, "you want to borrow money. Where's you're collateral?" The frog gestures to the cheap ceramic figures he's dumped out of his bag, and the boss's eyes immediately light up. He turns back to his loan agent and says, "those are knick-knacks Patty Black! Give the frog a loan!"
Told you it was bad. The best part is how far you have to go for that horrible pun of a punchline. 
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| William Shakespeare wrote: |
| Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none. |
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Mr Takosuke
Title: :bell:
Joined: Jun 30 2010
Location: Whore Island
Posts: 180
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You guys want a lame joke? Next time any of you use a urinal, look down.
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JoshWoodzy
Joined: May 22 2008
Location: Goshen, VA
Posts: 6544
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Mushroom walks into a bar, but the bartender says "Hey, freak. We don't serve your kind here."
Mushroom says "Why not, I'm a fungi!"
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Atma
Title: Dragoon
Joined: Apr 29 2010
Location: Cincinnati, OH
Posts: 2450
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Q: You hear about the new Pirate Movie?
A: Its Rated Arrrrrrrrrrrr
Two Peanuts walked into a bar. One was a salted.
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SNESGuy
Title: El Duderino
Joined: Jul 31 2010
Location: Da D.C
Posts: 1831
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Two muffins are baking in the oven, when one turns to the other and says, "It’s getting hot in here." The other looks over and screams, "WHOA, A TALKING MUFFIN!"
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HardcoreGamer4Ever
Title: I Am The God Of Awesome
Joined: Jun 28 2010
Location: Your Mom's Vagina!
Posts: 1298
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Sehkmaenzo
Joined: Jun 29 2010
Posts: 1818
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"Hello. I am a Canadian and I can kill you"
"You can WHAT?"
"Canadian"
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