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Adventures in Home Shopping


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GPFontaine
Joined: Dec 06 2007
Location: Connecticut
PostPosted: Apr 20 2009 12:25 am Reply with quote Back to top

This property is for sale!
MLS ID #M9111229

Map: http://is.gd/tnwX

On a map it looks like a sweet home.

In print, there are some bad details about a pipe bursting this past winter and the owners needing to fix it up, but they are selling the house for close to $300,000 below where it was just two years ago.

My wife and I decided to take a look at this 4,000+ sq ft behemoth.

So GPFontaine, why the fuck are you showing this to us? Did you buy it or what?

NO!

Fuck NO!

We arrived just after dusk when there was barely any visible light. It was just about the time when crickets go nuts and the drive up to this house under construction was creepy as hell. Look at the driveway on the map above and you'll see why it was so creepy. Picture it being dark and driving right next to the water with no lights other than a glow just above the horizon.

So we got to the house and this was the front lawn:
Image

Dark and spooky!

But nothing could have prepared us for what we would see when we opened the car door.

Its close to midnight and something evils lurking in the dark
Under the moonlight you see a sight that almost stops your heart
You try to scream but terror takes the sound before you make it
You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes,
Youre paralyzed
cause this is thriller, thriller night
And no ones gonna save you from the beast about strike
You know its thriller, thriller night
Youre fighting for your life inside a killer, thriller tonight



Image

I could not make this shit up if I tried. There was a life sized vampire doll and half a coffin just laying in the driveway to greet us. Way to fucking sell a house, you fucking retarded home owners...

We did tour the house and agreed not to go for it due to its size and location not being ideal. Still... I was waiting for Michael Jackson to attack me in his red jacket while we were in the home.



 
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Slayer1
Title: ,,!,, for you know who
Joined: Sep 23 2008
PostPosted: Apr 20 2009 11:09 am Reply with quote Back to top

Where's Dr. Frank'n'Furter to start singing Sweet Transvestite when you need him?
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SoldierHawk
Moderator
Title: Warrior-Poet
Joined: Jan 15 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
PostPosted: Apr 20 2009 03:19 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Oh damn Slay, you beat me to the reference. But I was going to go with, "There's a liiiiiiiight....over at the Frankenstein plaaaaace...." Very Happy


militarysignatures.com

William Shakespeare wrote:
Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

 
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JoshWoodzy
Joined: May 22 2008
Location: Goshen, VA
PostPosted: Apr 20 2009 03:28 pm Reply with quote Back to top

That's no vampire, that's fucking Abe Vigoda dude.


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Slayer1
Title: ,,!,, for you know who
Joined: Sep 23 2008
PostPosted: Apr 20 2009 03:43 pm Reply with quote Back to top

SoldierHawk wrote:
Oh damn Slay, you beat me to the reference. But I was going to go with, "There's a liiiiiiiight....over at the Frankenstein plaaaaace...." Very Happy

Well It's astounding, time is fleeting, GPF should have bought this home, He could've had a, Rocky horror show, where madness, takes it's toll.

Wow... i need a girlfriend and a therapist. The fact that I started to sing Time Warp with GPF's little story into it is just to much...
And to be honest, I probably would have shit my pants if I had seen that holloween decoration.
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SoldierHawk
Moderator
Title: Warrior-Poet
Joined: Jan 15 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
PostPosted: Apr 20 2009 04:02 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Oh what the hell...as long as we're giving RHPS love...



Fun fact: Frank's entrance may be the coolest entrance in the history of the motion picture.


militarysignatures.com

William Shakespeare wrote:
Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

 
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Slayer1
Title: ,,!,, for you know who
Joined: Sep 23 2008
PostPosted: Apr 20 2009 04:19 pm Reply with quote Back to top

That's what i call Teamwork sis, we just rocky horrored this thread! Very Happy

If GPF had bought the house, I could imagine him running around either as Rocky or Riff Raff... we'd have to video tape that one Very Happy
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