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My angry letter to Nintendo


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JRA
Joined: Sep 17 2007
Location: The Opium Trail
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 01:54 pm Reply with quote Back to top

I sent this in their feedback section for the Wii not 10 minutes ago:


Dear Nintendo,

I am writing to complain about the lack of good games you are putting onto your Virtual Console, you guys have seriously been fucking that up pronto. You guys use to release two virtual console games no matter the system every week, and now you've dropped the ball. What's the matter, not making you enough money? Speaking of money, what's surprising me is the lack of POPULAR games you guys are releasing to the VC. This week you guys released "light force" a lack luster NES game that nobody remembers. Where's Contra 1, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2 and 3? Does Konami have your balls in a bag ever since you guys used Snake and Smash Bros. Brawl. You guys have SuperC and Contra III on there, which is good, I will give you credit for that. But not having Contra 1? I was talking to a fellow gamer about VC purchases, he said he might go buy Contra 1, and I told him it's not available on there. He gave me a cross-eyed look of confusion and annoyance.

Here's another game missing from your library, Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island! What the hell is taking this game so long? That's the only Mario console game that's missing! And don't give me the "well we've already re-released it on Game Boy Advance." Yea, ALONG WITH EVERY OTHER MARIO GAME, yet all of those were put on the Virtual Console as well! Hell you even put Mario 64 on the DS (which seems to be your excuse for not putting the likes of Chrono Trigger or any of the Final Fantasy games on the VC) yet you still put that on the VC!

Like I said, it's not as if these are games that only the most jaded of nerds would remember, these are popular games that are sure to hand you guys the big bucks! Case in point, back in September you guys put Super Mario RPG on the VC (a game I never thought you guys would release, given your "put it on the DS relationship with Square), one my favorite games of all time, and not only did I buy it, its still one of the top selling VC titles! Go look at the Popular Titles section and you'll see it on the second page, along with Castlevania III another game I thought you guys would never release. The basic premise here is, you guys release stupid shit like "Life Force" and it doesn't sell. But you guys release a classic like Mario RPG and it rockets straight to the top! And no, I don't care that a lot of games you guys have yet to release are third party games. If people like Konami, and Rare are going to be stingy bastards about it, just make the game 600 instead of 500 or 900 instead of 800 so they'll quit their whining!

Here are 10 games (in particular order) you guys need to drop whatever it is you are doing and put on the VC at all costs!

Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island
Contra
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: The Arcade Game
TMNT 3
TMNT 4
Banjo-Kazooie
Conker's Bad Fur Day
Goldeneye
Mega Man X
Legend Of Zelda Majora's Mask

So unless you guys want to be put out of business by Xbox and the PS3, you'll heed my advice

Sincerely,
Josh Apkin



I'm not exactly expecting much, but with all the complaining I do on this website, I figure I should at least put the effort where it matters.

By the way, yes some NES game called "Life Force" or some shit was released on the VC today. No... just no.


There are a lot of what if's in life Donny. What if I hit you really hard in the face, knocked yo shit to the back of yo skull? What if I....had you girl gargle my nuts? The fact remains, you are a fuckin mutant.
 
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Syd Lexia
Site Admin
Title: Pop Culture Junkie
Joined: Jul 30 2005
Location: Wakefield, MA
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 02:03 pm Reply with quote Back to top

I wrote a similar, swear-free letter a year or so ago.

As for Banjo and Conker, those are Rare games, and MS owns Rare.
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Not Sure
Too Good At 2D Games
Too Good At 2D Games
Title: Master of the Universe
Joined: Dec 03 2007
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 02:12 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Life Force is great.


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Tyro
Joined: Feb 12 2009
Location: Canada land
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 02:17 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Honestly, if they released all of the good games right off the bat then there would be nothing else to release. Part of the thrill of the Virtual Console is almost finding new games.

But yeah, they should release some of those games soon though.
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GPFontaine
Joined: Dec 06 2007
Location: Connecticut
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 02:18 pm Reply with quote Back to top

JRA wrote:
I sent this in their feedback section for the Wii not 10 minutes ago:


Dear Nintendo,

I am writing to complain about the lack of good games you are putting onto your Virtual Console, you guys have seriously been fucking


I got this far. That is how far they will get.

Change the language or you will not have your voice heard.



 
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Nekkoru
Title: Polish Pickle Wench
Joined: Jan 25 2008
Location: Warsaw, Poland
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 02:19 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Yeah, you shut your mouth. Life Force was basically Gradius 2 for the NES. Except, you know, when Life Force debuted, Gradius 2 wasn't out yet.

The NES port of Life Force was released the same year as Gradius 2, though.

Look, when you have the Gradius license on something, this means the game is good and you can fork over the cash safely, because YOU KNOW YOU WILL BE ENTERTAINED - aren't games supposed to do that?


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JRA
Joined: Sep 17 2007
Location: The Opium Trail
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 03:03 pm Reply with quote Back to top

I definitely exercised extreme restraint in terms of swearing. These are gamers we're talking about here, they should be used to it. If they don't read it because of it, that's their loss, and they shouldn't come crying to me because they didn't win the "coolest video game company of the year award" or whatever.

As for MS owning Rare, that didn't stop them from putting out the Donkey kong Country games.


Tyro wrote:
Honestly, if they released all of the good games right off the bat then there would be nothing else to release. Part of the thrill of the Virtual Console is almost finding new games.

But yeah, they should release some of those games soon though.



Which to me sounds like an awful marketing strategy. My solution would be to release all the popular games first and then release the lesser knowns as time goes on.


There are a lot of what if's in life Donny. What if I hit you really hard in the face, knocked yo shit to the back of yo skull? What if I....had you girl gargle my nuts? The fact remains, you are a fuckin mutant.
 
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DarknessDeku
Title: Deku Scrub
Joined: Dec 08 2007
Location: The Forest
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 03:09 pm Reply with quote Back to top

GPFontaine wrote:
JRA wrote:
I sent this in their feedback section for the Wii not 10 minutes ago:


Dear Nintendo,

I am writing to complain about the lack of good games you are putting onto your Virtual Console, you guys have seriously been fucking


I got this far. That is how far they will get.

Change the language or you will not have your voice heard.


LMAO, you are a hypocrite! Look at all the language you have in your job interview article! From now on I will stop reading your articles when I reach the first cuss word.


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He knows your algorithm.

 
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Black Zarak
Title: Big Coffin Hunter
Joined: Feb 01 2006
Location: Phyrexia
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 03:20 pm Reply with quote Back to top

You should also probably double check your grammar and spelling after cutting out the profanity, you use "use" when you mean "used" at one point and there were a few other things I can't remember off hand. Not saying it to be a dick, just that if you want them to read the whole thing, you gotta be eloquent and not a raging fanboy.


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JRA
Joined: Sep 17 2007
Location: The Opium Trail
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 03:30 pm Reply with quote Back to top

While I appreciate the feedback, like I said I've already sent it to them and don't really feel like drawing up a second copy. If they read it and take the advice, great. If not, well, at least I put myself out there.


There are a lot of what if's in life Donny. What if I hit you really hard in the face, knocked yo shit to the back of yo skull? What if I....had you girl gargle my nuts? The fact remains, you are a fuckin mutant.
 
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Ba'al
Title: Zerg Zergling
Joined: Mar 02 2008
Location: Uranus
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 04:17 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Nekkoru wrote:
Yeah, you shut your mouth. Life Force was basically Gradius 2 for the NES. Except, you know, when Life Force debuted, Gradius 2 wasn't out yet.

The NES port of Life Force was released the same year as Gradius 2, though.

Life Force is actually Salamander, a spin-off Gradius series which had it's graphics modifed during localization for some reason. Most likely to differ itself up more from it's sister game Gradius.

But yeah, I love Salamander/Life Force....not to mention they released Gradius II: Gofer no Yabou, which is awesome to me.


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GPFontaine
Joined: Dec 06 2007
Location: Connecticut
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 04:22 pm Reply with quote Back to top

DarknessDeku wrote:
GPFontaine wrote:
JRA wrote:
I sent this in their feedback section for the Wii not 10 minutes ago:


Dear Nintendo,

I am writing to complain about the lack of good games you are putting onto your Virtual Console, you guys have seriously been fucking


I got this far. That is how far they will get.

Change the language or you will not have your voice heard.


LMAO, you are a hypocrite! Look at all the language you have in your job interview article! From now on I will stop reading your articles when I reach the first cuss word.


That isn't hypocritical at all. In fact, it is perhaps the opposite.

When you want something, you need to be clear, logical, defined, and well perceived. When you don't want something, who gives a fuck?

I don't want anything from anyone who reads my article other than for them to enjoy it or benefit from it. You certainly won't see me swearing on my resume or cover letters. I also will not be swearing during an interview.

In a forum though... in this forum? Well fuck yes, I will fucking say fuck whenever I fucking want to fucking say fuck.

As for a letter to a major company... they will stop reading a rant at the first swear. This isn't me being a dick or going back on my ways, I have nothing to do with it. They will stop reading it. And as for me stopping reading it... it was because he said it was a letter to a company, if it had been a letter just posted on the internet, it would have been fine, nothing wrong with some good ranting rage. Once it is addressed to a company and officially submitted, it can't be a rant, or it won't have any validity.



 
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SoldierHawk
Moderator
Title: Warrior-Poet
Joined: Jan 15 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 04:27 pm Reply with quote Back to top

DarknessDeku wrote:

LMAO, you are a hypocrite! Look at all the language you have in your job interview article! From now on I will stop reading your articles when I reach the first cuss word.


I understand where you're coming from, but your letter and GP's article had two very different audiences. GP was writing to people like us, for whom swearing is a part of everyday communication (at least among ourselves.) You were writing, not to gamers, but to customer service people, who in all likelihood will not take as kindly to it.

Does that make your letter, or your point, bad? Of course not. Does it mean you need to write a new one? Hell no. The feedback was just to increase your chances of getting your voice heard at the higher level where it will actually make a difference. Its nothing bad on you, your point, or your writing. GP knows what he's talking about when he discusses corporate communication, though, so it might be wise to take what he says under advisement for next time. My two cents *shrug*


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IceWarm
Joined: Dec 22 2008
Location: Breckenridge, Colorado
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 05:04 pm Reply with quote Back to top

They need to put Earthbound on the VC so I can play it on mt TV instead of having to use an emulator.


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Douche McCallister
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Title: DOO-SHAY
Joined: Jan 26 2007
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PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 05:20 pm Reply with quote Back to top

The trick here is Nintendo's Marketing strategy, they don't want to saturate the market with A+ games. Simply because if there are tons of great games, your not going to purchase them all at once. Leaving some garrunteed sales to potentially fall through the cracks. Plus if the consumers know that "these are the games for the month/week" (what have you) they are more likely to try out games they have little recollection/knowledge of. It makes sense to me, but I completely understand your gripe.


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DarkMaze
Joined: Feb 24 2006
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 05:29 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Douche McCallister wrote:
The trick here is Nintendo's Marketing strategy, they don't want to saturate the market with A+ games. Simply because if there are tons of great games, your not going to purchase them all at once. Leaving some garrunteed sales to potentially fall through the cracks. Plus if the consumers know that "these are the games for the month/week" (what have you) they are more likely to try out games they have little recollection/knowledge of. It makes sense to me, but I completely understand your gripe.

BINGO!

Just because you don't like it doesn't mean they're not getting what they want out of it. (But that doesn't mean it isn't a pain, either.)
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Ba'al
Title: Zerg Zergling
Joined: Mar 02 2008
Location: Uranus
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 05:47 pm Reply with quote Back to top

My biggest pet peeve with the VC is that Ninty takes forever to put a new N64 game up, however Sony also sucks at updating the PSN with new PS1 games. So maybe it's a virus that spreads to all game companies that slows down their interest in putting new 3D titles up, and it has yet to hit Microsoft.


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Ghandi
Title: Alexz Aficionado
Joined: May 21 2008
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 05:54 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Not Sure wrote:
Life Force is great.


^This.

But I see your point.


RIP Hacker

Alexz Johnson

 
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JRA
Joined: Sep 17 2007
Location: The Opium Trail
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 06:05 pm Reply with quote Back to top

I has a response!!!


Hi Josh,

I appreciate your taking the time to share your comments with us regarding the games that you would like to see released on the virtual console. Unfortunately, it is not always a question of money, and there are many items that come into play when determining which titles may be released. However, rest assured that your email will be forwarded on to the appropriate department for further review.

Sincerely,

Bruce Mann
Nintendo of America Inc.


There are a lot of what if's in life Donny. What if I hit you really hard in the face, knocked yo shit to the back of yo skull? What if I....had you girl gargle my nuts? The fact remains, you are a fuckin mutant.
 
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SoldierHawk
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Title: Warrior-Poet
Joined: Jan 15 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 06:06 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Congratulations!


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DarkMaze
Joined: Feb 24 2006
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 06:06 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Bruce Mann is Batwayne's secret identity.
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JRA
Joined: Sep 17 2007
Location: The Opium Trail
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 06:12 pm Reply with quote Back to top

DarkMaze wrote:
Bruce Mann is Batwayne's secret identity.


EPIC LULZ!!!


There are a lot of what if's in life Donny. What if I hit you really hard in the face, knocked yo shit to the back of yo skull? What if I....had you girl gargle my nuts? The fact remains, you are a fuckin mutant.
 
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Ghandi
Title: Alexz Aficionado
Joined: May 21 2008
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 06:19 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Now there be some changes at Nintendo!


RIP Hacker

Alexz Johnson

 
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JRA
Joined: Sep 17 2007
Location: The Opium Trail
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 06:29 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Ghandi wrote:
Now there be some changes at Nintendo!



I doubt it. Smile


There are a lot of what if's in life Donny. What if I hit you really hard in the face, knocked yo shit to the back of yo skull? What if I....had you girl gargle my nuts? The fact remains, you are a fuckin mutant.
 
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Syd Lexia
Site Admin
Title: Pop Culture Junkie
Joined: Jul 30 2005
Location: Wakefield, MA
PostPosted: Feb 16 2009 06:32 pm Reply with quote Back to top

JRA wrote:
As for MS owning Rare, that didn't stop them from putting out the Donkey kong Country games.

There's a whole confusing legal situation, and I may not have it quite right, but it's something like this...

Rare doesn't own the rights to Donkey Kong Country. Nintendo always owned the rights to the characters, and if they didn't own the physical DKC programming code before they sold off Rare, they bought it as part of the sale. As for IPs developed exclusively by Rare, I believe Rare retained the rights to the IPs, but Nintendo retained partial - if not total - rights to the original games.

So in order for Nintendo to release one of the Rare's games (other than Donkey Kong 64 or Diddy Kong Racing) on the VC, they need to reach a licensing agreement with MS. In order for MS to port an old Rare game, they need to reach a licensing agreement with Nintendo. Nintendo and Microsoft clashed over GoldenEye last year. Rare developed an HD remake of Goldeneye with netplay for XBLA, but Nintendo refused to sign off on it because MS didn't offer them enough money. Because of this, we will almost certainly NEVER see GoldenEye on the VC either. Apparently they did reach a deal with B-K though, because a B-K remake is available on XBLA.
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