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Dan
Joined: Jun 14 2009
Posts: 22
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So about 6 months ago I broke up with the girl I planned on marrying. She was cheating on me. Sweet. But not all was lost. A few cool things actually happened after we broke up.
1. I had time again
2. I had money again
3. Logically following #s 1 & 2, I bought a wii
4. I stopped giving a fuck
Now, I had kind of expected the first two. Those always happen after a break up. #4, however, was a pleasant surprise. When I went out to the bar, I realized that even if I got rejected by a girl, I didn't care. At all. So I started to play a game with my friends. They would give me an absolutely ridiculous pickup line and I would use it on whoever they chose. Usually, the reactions were better than you'd think. Unless the girl was there with a meathead. Those times I got close to getting my ass kicked.
So, I want to play the game with everyone on these forums. Friday I take my last final and I am done with school for the 10 day summer. So, I have time to go out. This Friday (6/19/09), I will pick 10 pickup lines from this thread and use each one word for word on a girl at the bar. As soon as the conversation ends, I will take notes about what happened and will post the girl's reactions sometime the next day. If I can get one of my friends in on it (or someone from this forum if you live in the DC area), I will try to post pics of my attempts as well. Ill let you guys know which ones I am going to use before I go out.
So, post away and let me make an ass of myself saying things you have always wanted to say 
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Ross Rifle
Title: Rock N Roll God
Joined: Oct 29 2006
Location: Chilliwack, BC
Posts: 4844
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Welcome to the forums Dan, I love you. 
I'm gonna work on one for ya!
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Douche McCallister
Moderator
Title: DOO-SHAY
Joined: Jan 26 2007
Location: Private Areas
Posts: 5672
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"What fucks like a tiger and winks? (wink at here) THIS GUY!"
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MOGHARR
Title: The Original CandyWafer
Joined: Apr 05 2007
Location: Under Jolly Roger
Posts: 2718
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I love this guy 
Now I have something to think about all day.
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"Well I don`t judge most things by graphics, reality has amazing graphics, and I don`t like it, that`s why I play video games." Laminated Sky on Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker |
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Syd Lexia
Site Admin
Title: Pop Culture Junkie
Joined: Jul 30 2005
Location: Wakefield, MA
Posts: 24886
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That blouse is very becoming on you. If I was on you, I'd be cumming too.
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JRA
Joined: Sep 17 2007
Location: The Opium Trail
Posts: 3475
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| Syd Lexia wrote: |
| That blouse is very becoming on you. If I was on you, I'd be cumming too. |
Hmmm. That's...kinda clever (or I'm just fucking retarded).
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There are a lot of what if's in life Donny. What if I hit you really hard in the face, knocked yo shit to the back of yo skull? What if I....had you girl gargle my nuts? The fact remains, you are a fuckin mutant. |
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anorexorcist
Title: Polar Bear
Joined: May 21 2008
Location: The Cock and Plucket
Posts: 2131
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You need a stuffed rooster...or any kind of rooster, I don't recomend a live one.
Hold it in one hand so it is visible, go up behind a girl, tap her on the shoulder and ask "you you like to hold/touch/stroke my cock?" before she turns around, then when she does, she see's the rooster.
It's a little elaborate but I think it would be worth it.
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Lawyers, Guns and Money |
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Valdronius
Moderator
Title: SydLexia COO
Joined: Aug 22 2005
Location: The Great White North
Posts: 4465
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"If you think the Vulcan mind meld is cool, wait til you experience the Romulan genital meld."
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| Klimbatize wrote: |
| A Hispanic dude living in Arizona knows a lot of Latinas? That's fucking odd. |
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Dan
Joined: Jun 14 2009
Posts: 22
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Haha... good work guys... keep em coming!
anorexorcist, I like it. But I would probably say "I gotta run to the bathroom. Will you hold my cock?" then show her the rooster
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MOGHARR
Title: The Original CandyWafer
Joined: Apr 05 2007
Location: Under Jolly Roger
Posts: 2718
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Here's an okay one I found.
"Was your dad an astrologist? Because he stole all the stars in the night sky and put them in your eyes. Also, I'm looking for a summer internship in that field...and I'm willing to fuck my way to the top"
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"Well I don`t judge most things by graphics, reality has amazing graphics, and I don`t like it, that`s why I play video games." Laminated Sky on Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker |
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anorexorcist
Title: Polar Bear
Joined: May 21 2008
Location: The Cock and Plucket
Posts: 2131
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| Dan wrote: |
Haha... good work guys... keep em coming!
anorexorcist, I like it. But I would probably say "I gotta run to the bathroom. Will you hold my cock?" then show her the rooster |
That works even better. It's a prototype and has not yet had field testing so if you use it, make any adjustments you see fit.
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Lawyers, Guns and Money |
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LowEndLem
Title: Not Gay
Joined: Mar 19 2009
Location: Illinois
Posts: 966
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"Wanna put the sex back in sexually transmitted disease?"
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<docinsano>i beat off using save states
<Tako> But, brontosaurs ate plants. It wouldn't be a threat to Jesus.
Why? Fuck you, that's why. |
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Ross Rifle
Title: Rock N Roll God
Joined: Oct 29 2006
Location: Chilliwack, BC
Posts: 4844
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K, here's a few for ya-
"The word of the day is "legs". Let's say we go back to my place and spread the word."
"Giant Polar Bear" ("What?") "It's an icebreaker. Hi, I'm Dan."
"Do you have any raisins? No? Well how about a date?"
"Are you gay?" ("no.") "Oh wow, me neither! Let's have sex!"
"I have a magic watch that talks to me. It says you aren't wearing any underwear, is that true?" ("No.") "Oh shit, it's an hour fast!"
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Crazy_Bastard
Title: CeeBee
Joined: Feb 25 2007
Location: Tulsa
Posts: 489
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Your eyes are bluer than the water in my toilet.
Or:
Is that candy corn in yor shirt, or are you just happy to see me?
That is all i can think of at the moment... You better post the results of eah of our submissions later
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anorexorcist
Title: Polar Bear
Joined: May 21 2008
Location: The Cock and Plucket
Posts: 2131
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Just get drunk, anything you say will sound golden to you and you won't feel any slap you recieve.
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Lawyers, Guns and Money |
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Dan
Joined: Jun 14 2009
Posts: 22
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Haha... there will be no alcohol involved until I do all 10.
#1 - I have to pull off the lines
#2 - I have to be able to write down what happened
#3 - I have to be sober enough that I can find the drunk girls at the end of the night
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Crazy_Bastard
Title: CeeBee
Joined: Feb 25 2007
Location: Tulsa
Posts: 489
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I say up the count to 20. 
also, you should join us sometime on IRC.
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Kojjiro!
Joined: Feb 16 2008
Posts: 832
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Get an airhorn, a headband and sound it off in the bar
when everyone turns just point to yourself and go
'this guy right here? single."
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Dr. Jeebus
Moderator
Title: SLF Harbinger of Death
Joined: Sep 03 2005
Location: Wakefield, MA
Posts: 5228
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jackfrost
Title: Cold Hearted Bastard
Joined: Feb 21 2009
Posts: 861
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If I were you I would put the responses on Youtube. That would make you an internet celebrity. If the reactions are positive you would have your own porn site. If not it would be hilarious and you would be an internet celebrity as the guy who doesn't give a shit. It is a win/win situation. I need to party with your ass.
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Teralyx
Title: Master Exploder
Joined: Jun 04 2008
Location: Goldenrod City
Posts: 1419
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"If you were a booger, I'd pick you first."
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<TheFlamingSchnitzel> Didn't your mom teach you not to punch girls?
<FigNewton> I was too busy /punchin' her/ |
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jackfrost
Title: Cold Hearted Bastard
Joined: Feb 21 2009
Posts: 861
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| anorexorcist wrote: |
You need a stuffed rooster...or any kind of rooster, I don't recomend a live one.
Hold it in one hand so it is visible, go up behind a girl, tap her on the shoulder and ask "you you like to hold/touch/stroke my cock?" before she turns around, then when she does, she see's the rooster.
It's a little elaborate but I think it would be worth it. |
You need a rooster and chicken to make it work. Then you could ask for the woman to hold your cock an pullet.
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Cameron
Title: :O � O:
Joined: Feb 01 2008
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 4637
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"You be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King. You treat me right, and I'll do it your way."
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ChiSoxFan
Title: Chicago Sports Fan
Joined: May 11 2009
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 184
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| Cameron wrote: |
| "You be my Dairy Queen, I'll be your Burger King. You treat me right, and I'll do it your way." |
Win and success.
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SoldierHawk
Moderator
Title: Warrior-Poet
Joined: Jan 15 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 6113
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I'm not a good person to ask for pickup lines because they all make me want to smash things. But I will say sorry about your girl, and good luck this weekend. Hope it all goes well.
P.S. A belated welcome to the forums, too!
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| William Shakespeare wrote: |
| Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none. |
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