I was watching "Falling Down" the other day, and goddammit, D-FENS is right. Golf courses are a waste of fucking space. 50 acres of land completely wasted so a hundred or so boring white men can waste their day playing the dullest goddam game ever invented.
If I were president, I'd seize every single golf course by eminent domain and turn them into federal parks that everyone can enjoy.
George Carlin had a particularly excellent rant about Golf Courses in one of his books, and some of his stand up I think.
Ah here it is!
JRA
Joined: Sep 17 2007
Location: The Opium Trail
Posts: 3475
Posted:
May 30 2009 11:31 am
The best part of that video is when George says let them play Miniature golf. "Let them fuck with a windmill for an hour and a half, see if there's any skill among these people." Mini golf FTW!
docinsano
Title: Boner King
Joined: Jan 08 2008
Location: Mpls Mini Soda
Posts: 2314
Posted:
May 30 2009 04:17 pm
I've always heard the two biggest wastes of space are golf courses and cemeteries.
George Carlin had a particularly excellent rant about Golf Courses in one of his books, and some of his stand up I think.
Ah here it is!
Oh, why do the good die young and the old linger around (i'm looking at you dick c)
The golf course thing always confused the hell out of me. Why is it so popular? The whole idea of a sport is to be stimulated and all golf seems to stimulate is frustration and boredom. If the rich bastards want to get way from the wife, why not just take a trip out of the country and fuck some of the local girls.
Oh and Syd, you just mentioned one of my favorite movies ever. Falling Down is a must see, it has Micheal Douglas' best performance and so many messages that americans need to hear.
It's hard for me to believe that Falling Down was under the same directorial direction as "Batman and Robin", some how Joel is on my best and worst movie lists.
Links, pics, vids . . . I shall post these when given the chance
Transformers 2 Review: ". . . Did i mention SHIT BLOWS UP?!!!"
MOGHARR
Title: The Original CandyWafer
Joined: Apr 05 2007
Location: Under Jolly Roger
Posts: 2718
Posted:
May 30 2009 05:36 pm
And now you're going to die with that funny little hat on...
"Well I don`t judge most things by graphics, reality has amazing graphics, and I don`t like it, that`s why I play video games." Laminated Sky on Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker
SoldierHawk
Moderator
Title: Warrior-Poet
Joined: Jan 15 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 6113
Posted:
May 30 2009 05:45 pm
Syd Lexia wrote:
I was watching "Falling Down" the other day, and goddammit, D-FENS is right. Golf courses are a waste of fucking space. 50 acres of land completely wasted so a hundred or so boring white men can waste their day playing the dullest goddam game ever invented.
If I were president, I'd seize every single golf course by eminent domain and turn them into federal parks that everyone can enjoy.
I could not stand up and applaud harder if I tried. I have always felt that its particularly mean to have all of this beautiful grass, trees and open space...and that little kids aren't allowed to play on them. Fuck that. My grandmother has a story about how came to this country in the 50s, she had never seen a golf course before. Seeing all of the lovely "park" area, she took her two kids for a walk on it. Of course they got yelled at and kicked out, and treated doubly rudely since they couldn't speak English. She had come here after living under the Nazis' bootheels for five years, and almost starving to death during the Dutch Hunger Winter, so it was a particular kick in the balls. I still wish I could give whoever did that a slap in the face.
Golf courses out here in SoCal are particularly insulting because of the huge drought we've been going through for quite a few years now. All we hear is, "conserve water. Turn off your sprinklers, let your lawn and plants die." Fuck you, asshole. I'll let the small patch of greeness in my back yard, and my three fruit trees, die when you fuckers let those acres and acres of water-sucking sod that is enjoyed by maybe 20-30 exclusive club members a day, go brown.
William Shakespeare wrote:
Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.
UsaSatsui
Title: The White Rabbit
Joined: May 25 2008
Location: Hiding
Posts: 7565
Posted:
May 30 2009 05:49 pm
But where will white men practice their overt racism and sexism if we close all the golf courses?
But where will white men practice their overt racism and sexism if we close all the golf courses?
Holy shit, this closing the golf course idea just gets better and better. Maybe Tyler Durden was on to something.
William Shakespeare wrote:
Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.
ReeperTheSeeker
Joined: Aug 26 2007
Posts: 2752
Posted:
May 30 2009 06:17 pm
UsaSatsui wrote:
But where will white men practice their overt racism and sexism if we close all the golf courses?
We send them to New Mexico to play their boring ass game in the A-Bomb test sites. Then the radiation will fry there brains and balls so they can't comprehend being racist and have no dick to be proud of.
That was mean, lets just send them to the inner city mini-golf course right when the day care centers plan a field trip.
Links, pics, vids . . . I shall post these when given the chance
Transformers 2 Review: ". . . Did i mention SHIT BLOWS UP?!!!"
Bouya
Title: Delinquent
Joined: Aug 15 2007
Location: Suzuran
Posts: 1443
Posted:
May 30 2009 10:22 pm
SoldierHawk wrote:
Golf courses out here in SoCal are particularly insulting because of the huge drought we've been going through for quite a few years now. All we hear is, "conserve water. Turn off your sprinklers, let your lawn and plants die." Fuck you, asshole. I'll let the small patch of greeness in my back yard, and my three fruit trees, die when you fuckers let those acres and acres of water-sucking sod that is enjoyed by maybe 20-30 exclusive club members a day, go brown.
You are aware that most golf courses (in So Cal anyway) tend to employ grey water, right?
GPFontaine
Joined: Dec 06 2007
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 11244
Posted:
May 30 2009 11:08 pm
Someone owns land and chooses to do ______________ with it and you are mad? It doesn't matter if they do ________ with their property as long as it isn't illegal. Last time I checked, cutting trees and shaping landscape is 100% legit.
As for the golf + white people = bad equation... Tiger Woods.
Bouya
Title: Delinquent
Joined: Aug 15 2007
Location: Suzuran
Posts: 1443
Posted:
May 31 2009 01:28 am
And Vijay Singh!
SoldierHawk
Moderator
Title: Warrior-Poet
Joined: Jan 15 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 6113
Posted:
May 31 2009 02:40 am
GPFontaine wrote:
Someone owns land and chooses to do ______________ with it and you are mad? It doesn't matter if they do ________ with their property as long as it isn't illegal. Last time I checked, cutting trees and shaping landscape is 100% legit.
Hey, in spite of the Fight Club reference, no one's burning them down. I just find it sad personally that all that beautiful grass and trees can't be used by kids and families whoever to play on. Of course people are free to do with their land what they like, but that doesn't mean everyone has to be in love with their choice.
Bjork, I do know most of 'em use recycled water, which is a good thing and I applaud their choice in that regard. (Hell, I even hear some are considering going to astroturf or something similar, although I'll believe that when I see it.) I do wish there was a way to extend that to individual households though; I would love to be able to water my lawn and veggie garden the same way. (Well, lawn at least...not sure if it would be safe for the vegetables, come to think of it.)
William Shakespeare wrote:
Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.
Bouya
Title: Delinquent
Joined: Aug 15 2007
Location: Suzuran
Posts: 1443
Posted:
May 31 2009 03:17 am
SoldierHawk wrote:
Bjork, I do know most of 'em use recycled water, which is a good thing and I applaud their choice in that regard. (Hell, I even hear some are considering going to astroturf or something similar, although I'll believe that when I see it.) I do wish there was a way to extend that to individual households though; I would love to be able to water my lawn and veggie garden the same way. (Well, lawn at least...not sure if it would be safe for the vegetables, come to think of it.)
That's actually a good question about the veggies. I know you're not supposed to drink it, but if you grow veggies with fertilizer...
SoldierHawk
Moderator
Title: Warrior-Poet
Joined: Jan 15 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 6113
Posted:
May 31 2009 03:22 am
-bjork- wrote:
That's actually a good question about the veggies. I know you're not supposed to drink it, but if you grow veggies with fertilizer...
Good point. I guess if they don't absorb bad stuff from cow shit, a little gray water probably won't hurt them.
William Shakespeare wrote:
Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.
Syd Lexia
Site Admin
Title: Pop Culture Junkie
Joined: Jul 30 2005
Location: Wakefield, MA
Posts: 24887
Posted:
May 31 2009 07:38 am
GPFontaine wrote:
Someone owns land and chooses to do ______________ with it and you are mad? It doesn't matter if they do ________ with their property as long as it isn't illegal. Last time I checked, cutting trees and shaping landscape is 100% legit.
Land ownership is a sham. The only reason anyone owns land is because they had better weapons (either literally or financially) than the person who was on the land before them.
So your great great grandfather shot a couple dozen injuns or swindled a couple hundred Irish immigrants out of their money. Big fucking deal. That doesn't give you the right to have a golf course.
I was just thinking, it's technically possibly to carry out the title of this thread, though you might want to wait until you're safely concealed under the cover of darkness to attempt a hole in one.
Little Mac
Joined: Mar 25 2009
Posts: 55
Posted:
May 31 2009 11:18 am
Yeah, this is one of those threads that sounded like a good idea when you posted it but just seems to come out as...well, crazy and a little racist.
You could change "golf course" to pretty much any sport, amusement park, shopping mall, etc. At least golf courses don't use taxpayer money to be built. They're all places that take up space, charge money for use, and appeal to a select portion of the population.
Fear the pink sweatsuit.
GPFontaine
Joined: Dec 06 2007
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 11244
Posted:
May 31 2009 05:47 pm
Syd Lexia wrote:
GPFontaine wrote:
Someone owns land and chooses to do ______________ with it and you are mad? It doesn't matter if they do ________ with their property as long as it isn't illegal. Last time I checked, cutting trees and shaping landscape is 100% legit.
Land ownership is a sham. The only reason anyone owns land is because they had better weapons (either literally or financially) than the person who was on the land before them.
So your great great grandfather shot a couple dozen injuns or swindled a couple hundred Irish immigrants out of their money. Big fucking deal. That doesn't give you the right to have a golf course.
Back a few hundred years, yeah, that was the way it worked. Now life isn't so much that way. You can fight about it, but I'm going to just call the police and have them escort you off my property. If you have a weapon they will most likely shoot you and then drag you off the property.
TheRoboSleuth
Title: Sleuth Mark IV
Joined: Aug 08 2006
Location: The Gritty Future
Posts: 2739
Posted:
May 31 2009 06:05 pm
My gripe aside from the others is the government money used to subsidize these things, presumably cause caddies are jobs made or something.
Syd Lexia
Site Admin
Title: Pop Culture Junkie
Joined: Jul 30 2005
Location: Wakefield, MA
Posts: 24887
Posted:
May 31 2009 06:32 pm
GPFontaine wrote:
Back a few hundred years, yeah, that was the way it worked. Now life isn't so much that way. You can fight about it, but I'm going to just call the police and have them escort you off my property. If you have a weapon they will most likely shoot you and then drag you off the property.
That's because now the major landowners have put laws in place to protect themselves from the same dirty tricks their ancestors used to obtain the land in the first place. No one deserves a golf course. They are monuments to laziness and douchebaggery.
