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Ross Rifle
Title: Rock N Roll God
Joined: Oct 29 2006
Location: Chilliwack, BC
Posts: 4844
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It's a tale that took me across two cities and to the river. I'll recall this tale for you in the form of a conversation I had this morning at the river.
Me: Hey, can I borrow a bucket?
Random Fisherman: I'll see if I have one. What for?
Me: Well, I was here drinking last night and lost my glasses. I think they're in that 15-foot long puddle.
Fisherman: Fuck, eh?
*Fisherman gives me a pop bottle*
--5 Minutes Later--
Me: So I just got a phone call and apparently I wasn't wearing a shirt last night and therefore wasn't wearing my glasses, because I just found my aviators over there. So I think they're in the car of some girl I met last night.
Fisherman: Right on. Did you get your groove on?
Me: Well, kinda. But there was two of them, so it kinda made up for it.
* Fisherman gives me a knowing nod*
Last night was...one of those nights. I woke up this morning (by morning I mean 1:30pm) with a wicked hangover, all my clothes were in a dirty, muddy mound on the floor, and my room stunk like river. Then the memories came flooding back. I guess I decided to go ahead and take advantage of the fact that Canada's legal age is 16 and got to second base with two girls at the same time (they were 17 though). So really, if 2 and 2 is 4, then 2nd plus 2nd equal 4th, ie. homebase right? 
Anyway, berate me, congratulate me, call bullshit, I just wanted to give you guys a couple conversation pieces because I'm going camping until Monday.
And the whole night came to be because my cousin's girlfriend wanted to buy a dildo.
Please, discuss.
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Lady_Satine
Title: Head of Lexian R&D
Joined: Oct 15 2005
Location: Metro area, Georgia
Posts: 7287
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This whole thing sounds like something Kevin Smith would write. Good job, soldier!
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 "Life is a waste of time. Time is a waste of life. Get wasted all the time, and you'll have the time of your life!" |
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Teralyx
Title: Master Exploder
Joined: Jun 04 2008
Location: Goldenrod City
Posts: 1419
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So are you still technically a virgin?
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<TheFlamingSchnitzel> Didn't your mom teach you not to punch girls?
<FigNewton> I was too busy /punchin' her/ |
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Chrisby
Joined: Mar 31 2006
Location: Where my computer is.
Posts: 1262
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Can't wait for the movie.
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MOGHARR
Title: The Original CandyWafer
Joined: Apr 05 2007
Location: Under Jolly Roger
Posts: 2718
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Afterwards did you fry up the back bacon eh?
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"Well I don`t judge most things by graphics, reality has amazing graphics, and I don`t like it, that`s why I play video games." Laminated Sky on Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker |
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Ross Rifle
Title: Rock N Roll God
Joined: Oct 29 2006
Location: Chilliwack, BC
Posts: 4844
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Yeah, I'm still non-technically a virgin. I think...I've found out that there's a lot of that night I don't remember...
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Nekkoru
Title: Polish Pickle Wench
Joined: Jan 25 2008
Location: Warsaw, Poland
Posts: 1319
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Better get a pregnancy test, man.
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You should totally check out the IRC channel.
While you're at it, go check out my band, Her Majesty's Heroines.
| Cameron wrote: |
I now bestow upon you the title of Most Awesome Person.  |
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GPFontaine
Joined: Dec 06 2007
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 11244
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Ross... it sounds like bad things happened while you were out. If you were able to walk home and poop without pain, you should be ok, but seriously man... might want to hang with some better friends.
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Ross Rifle
Title: Rock N Roll God
Joined: Oct 29 2006
Location: Chilliwack, BC
Posts: 4844
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I've been thinking the same thing actually. It's a holiday BC (and all of Canada?) today, and so it was a long weekend, and this whole week for me has been like a binge supported by my 'friends'. I'm in so much god-damned pain because I've aggravated my back injury, and I'm just sick of this. I'm gonna say good-bye to Lady Liquor for a little while (again).
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Nekkoru
Title: Polish Pickle Wench
Joined: Jan 25 2008
Location: Warsaw, Poland
Posts: 1319
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Seriously, dude. Get a pregnancy test ASAP. Or maybe six of 'em, just to be sure. After you're done with your pregnancy test, get some STD tests done.
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You should totally check out the IRC channel.
While you're at it, go check out my band, Her Majesty's Heroines.
| Cameron wrote: |
| I now bestow upon you the title of Most Awesome Person. |
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Ross Rifle
Title: Rock N Roll God
Joined: Oct 29 2006
Location: Chilliwack, BC
Posts: 4844
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I have been considering going in and getting tested. I think I will rather quickly.
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JRA
Joined: Sep 17 2007
Location: The Opium Trail
Posts: 3475
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2+2 while not equaling 4 in this case, that's still pretty impressive.
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There are a lot of what if's in life Donny. What if I hit you really hard in the face, knocked yo shit to the back of yo skull? What if I....had you girl gargle my nuts? The fact remains, you are a fuckin mutant. |
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Hacker
Banned
Joined: Sep 13 2008
Posts: 3129
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| Ross Rifle wrote: |
Fisherman: Fuck, eh? |
I knew canadians said eh
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Knyte
2010 SLF Tag Champ*
Title: Curator Of The VGM
Joined: Nov 01 2006
Location: Here I am.
Posts: 6749
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BCians (Is that what you call yourselves?) say "fuck" alot, too.
The most memorable quote from my last trip to BC was a Tattoo shop guy, who said, "We sure do say 'fuck' alot, eh?"
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Hacker
Banned
Joined: Sep 13 2008
Posts: 3129
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Ross have you ever been inclined to type "eh" at all (other than in this topic) on the forums?
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Ross Rifle
Title: Rock N Roll God
Joined: Oct 29 2006
Location: Chilliwack, BC
Posts: 4844
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Knyte,
Where in BC? And what shop?
hacker,
Yes we say 'eh?'! HARDY HAR HAR! It actually sounds a million times smoother than 'hey?' or 'huh?'
But yeah, after a long long LONG fucking week, full of confusion, pain, and self-loathing, I've decided that this is not something I'm at all proud of, and I regret it ever happening. 
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Cameron
Title: :O � O:
Joined: Feb 01 2008
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 4637
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| Ross Rifle wrote: |
| hacker,Yes we say 'eh?'! HARDY HAR HAR! It actually sounds a million times smoother than 'hey?' or 'huh?' |
Not to sound like a complete ignoramus, but what is the word "eh" used for? I've never heard of it before...
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Blackout
Title: Captain Oblivious
Joined: Sep 01 2007
Location: That Rainy State
Posts: 10376
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| Cameron wrote: |
| Ross Rifle wrote: |
| hacker,Yes we say 'eh?'! HARDY HAR HAR! It actually sounds a million times smoother than 'hey?' or 'huh?' |
Not to sound like a complete ignoramus, but what is the word "eh" used for? I've never heard of it before... |
It's their crazy version of huh used questioningly.
Your mom has a wooden leg with a bird house in it eh?
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MOGHARR
Title: The Original CandyWafer
Joined: Apr 05 2007
Location: Under Jolly Roger
Posts: 2718
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"Don't forget your toque eh?"
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"Well I don`t judge most things by graphics, reality has amazing graphics, and I don`t like it, that`s why I play video games." Laminated Sky on Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker |
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