I've had a theory about the movie Jumper since I saw it in July. Here it goes.
JESUS WAS A JUMPER.
That's right. Why else would Roland say "Only God should be able to be everywhere at once"? BECAUSE GOD(JESUS) WAS THE FIRST ONE TO DO THIS. Immaculate conception? J.J. Chrizzles jumped into Mary's womb as a sperm cell. It also explains a lot of his miracles. Turn water into wine? More like jump the water to a distillery and jump back! Disappear from a tomb? You know where this one's going.
<TheFlamingSchnitzel> Didn't your mom teach you not to punch girls?
<FigNewton> I was too busy /punchin' her/
Douche McCallister
Moderator
Title: DOO-SHAY
Joined: Jan 26 2007
Location: Private Areas
Posts: 5672
Posted:
Oct 09 2008 06:30 pm
While ridiculous in theory, in the movie, if I were Hayden I would have pleaded that to Samuel, right before I jumped into his face and made it explod with my knee.
Ross Rifle
Title: Rock N Roll God
Joined: Oct 29 2006
Location: Chilliwack, BC
Posts: 4844
Posted:
Oct 09 2008 11:27 pm
This Guy's smart....
Too bad we're stuck with ThatGuy, who's a complete douchecock.
I've had a theory about the movie Jumper since I saw it in July. Here it goes.
JESUS WAS A JUMPER.
That's right. Why else would Roland say "Only God should be able to be everywhere at once"? BECAUSE GOD(JESUS) WAS THE FIRST ONE TO DO THIS. Immaculate conception? J.J. Chrizzles jumped into Mary's womb as a sperm cell. It also explains a lot of his miracles. Turn water into wine? More like jump the water to a distillery and jump back! Disappear from a tomb? You know where this one's going.
This is probably my favorite post/thread ever.
Teralyx
Title: Master Exploder
Joined: Jun 04 2008
Location: Goldenrod City
Posts: 1419
Posted:
Oct 10 2008 04:32 pm
ross_rifle113 wrote:
This Guy's smart....
Too bad we're stuck with ThatGuy, who's a complete douchecock.
Fixed. I hope.
<TheFlamingSchnitzel> Didn't your mom teach you not to punch girls?
<FigNewton> I was too busy /punchin' her/
Ross Rifle
Title: Rock N Roll God
Joined: Oct 29 2006
Location: Chilliwack, BC
Posts: 4844
Posted:
Oct 10 2008 06:42 pm
I guess....it was a joke, just...I dunno. I didn't feel like putting the joke banner.
