SydLexia.com - The Forums :: View topic - This 10 yr old, is more badass than any of you will ever be.

Posted: May 27 2011 04:16 pm

http://www.wtsp.com/news/watercooler/article/194093/58/10-year-old-boy-wrangles-6-foot-gator

Kid gets charged by a 6 foot gator, beats it up, and drags it home.

Posted: May 27 2011 04:21 pm

While this is absolutely awesome, there is one--one--who is more badass than he:

Cracked wrote:

Alexis Goggins, Invincible Girl

Who was she?
Just an ordinary first grader, attending classes, hanging with her friends.

How She Stared Down Death:
She had to save her mom from some crazy dude. She did this by jumping in front of him and taking six bullets, point blank, including a couple to the head.

It started when some lowlife kidnapped Alexis and her mom (OK, the lowlife was the mom's boyfriend). The mother tried to stall the bad guy and managed to call 911, but the cops said they couldn't send anyone. Apparently they were all busy with more fucked up situations than a man holding a child hostage at gunpoint.

It was at this point that the gunman decided he should stamp his passport into hell and started shooting. Two bullets struck the mother before little Alexis dove between them, begging the shooter to stop. Without hesitation, he shot six times, little Alexis taking the bullets that would have killed her mother. By this time the cops arrived, as they figured things were getting really serious because now someone was actually shooting.

Alexis thought about dying for a second then decided she still had some shit to do. Death could only watch as she grabbed her stuff and headed back to the land of the living, despite some serious injuries that would have killed most of us twice and some of us three times.

This would be jaw-droppingly impressive for a 250-pound Marine combat vet, let alone a seven-year-old girl. And while we would like to cling to our original theory that she's actually an immortal Highlander, the truth is this seven-year-old girl is simply more man than we'll ever be.

Read more: 7 People Who Cheated Death (Then Kicked It In The Balls) | Cracked.com http://www.cracked.com/article_16497_7-people-who-cheated-death-then-kicked-it-in-balls_p2.html#ixzz1NaOu92jh

Actually the whole article is pretty good, but this is the chart-topper for sure.

Posted: May 27 2011 05:04 pm

Quote:

His grandfather, Benjie Cox, said when he saw the alligator in the front yard he called the Brevard County Sheriff's Office and wildlife officials.

Cox said after he gave Michael a stern talk about what he had done, the officers gave him one, too. He said they told him that if he was older, he would have been arrested and charged with a felony.

Cox said the alligator seemed like it was in bad shape, but wildlife officers said they were planning to release it back into the St. John's River.

Michael said he learned his lesson and will run if he ever sees another alligator.

So he beat back a deadly animal twice his size and gets a stern talking to by his grandpa and the police? They should be congratulating the kid! He should've run? Bah! They should give him a sword and pay him to exterminate the gators!

Joined: Jun 29 2010 Posts: 1818

More importantly, if he has slain a Gator, He could easily slay a grandpa.
I say leave that kid alone. :O

Posted: May 27 2011 05:55 pm

wow. is this kid in the forum battle? im voting for him

Posted: May 27 2011 06:27 pm

Hahaha that kid has an instant pussy getting story for the rest of his life. "Yeah, I beat an alligator to death when it attacked me when I was ten..."

Joined: May 22 2008 Location: Goshen, VA Posts: 6544

Well it didn't actually attack him. He hooked it with his goddamn fishing pole and he took it upon himself to beat it with sticks.

Posted: May 27 2011 06:30 pm

Posted: May 27 2011 06:31 pm

Wait, he didn't actually kill it!

Posted: May 27 2011 06:38 pm

When I read the title of this thread, one name came to mind: Huey Freeman.

Posted: May 27 2011 06:42 pm

SoldierHawk wrote:

Actually the whole article is pretty good, but this is the chart-topper for sure.

Quote:

Regardless, with his scalp hanging in huge flaps from his skull and bleeding heavily, Brent managed to get up and go for help. He got back to his car and drove 15 miles, covered in blood and bear bites. Death could only stand on the side of the road and shake its fist.

I love this line. Slightly related:

Banned Joined: Sep 13 2008 Posts: 3129

Quote:

Cox said after he gave Michael a stern talk about what he had done, the officers gave him one, too. He said they told him that if he was older, he would have been arrested and charged with a felony.

What the...
"You beat up something that could've killed you in a matter of seconds... Have fun getting butt raped by men that will probably kill you in a matter of minutes. All because you saved your own life"

Posted: May 28 2011 03:17 am

If kids nowadays need anything, it's more stern lectures about not wrasslin gators.

Posted: May 28 2011 08:52 am

He should have at least ripped an eye out to keep as a trophy.

Posted: May 28 2011 12:09 pm

Jesus Christ, you're not supposed to be fighting alligators until you're at least Age 15-17. I bet that kid got a ton of experience points.

Posted: May 28 2011 12:44 pm

The talking too was because jumping on an alligators back is not the right reaction to hooking one with a fishing pole lol. If the kid were less lucky he would be dead. Dragging it home, while awesome, was really dumb too. I can see why his parents and the cops needed to let him know that was not a good idea.

Posted: May 28 2011 01:58 pm

Preng wrote:

Jesus Christ, you're not supposed to be fighting alligators until you're at least Age 15-17. I bet that kid got a ton of experience points.

Hahaha, this is great.

Wizard Joined: Jun 12 2009 Posts: 4209

I would have bought him a chocolate sunday every day that month, if not the year. That's incredible.

Posted: May 30 2011 11:34 pm

I wonder if after the kid beat the shit out of the gator, he said ,"You're luggage"?

Joined: Apr 25 2011 Location: Orem, UT Posts: 75

Knyte wrote:

I wonder if after the kid beat the shit out of the gator, he said ,"You're luggage"?

YESSSSSSSSSSSS