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GPFontaine
Joined: Dec 06 2007
Location: Connecticut
Posts: 11244
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For those with penises, you may be surprised to learn how frequently your member stands up while the rest of your body is rendered catatonic by the muscular paralysis that keeps you from acting out your dreams. (And thank goodness for that. Carlos Schenck and his colleagues [pdf] from the University of Minnesota Regional Sleep Disorders Center describe the case of a 19-year-old with sleep-related dissociative disorder crawling around his house on all fours, growling, and chewing on a piece of bacon—he was ‘dreaming’ of being a jungle cat and pouncing on a slab of raw meat held by a female zookeeper.) Scientists have determined that the average 13- to 79-year-old penis is erect for about 90 minutes each night, or 20 percent of overall sleep time. With your brain cycling between the four sleep stages, your "sleep-related erections" appear at 85-minute intervals lasting, on average, 25 minutes. (It’s true; they used a stopwatch.) I didn’t come upon any evolutionary theories or a proposed "adaptive function" of NPT, but we do know that it’s not related to daytime sexual activity, it declines (no pun intended) with age, and it’s correlated positively with testosterone levels. Females similarly exhibit vaginal lubrication during their REM-sleep, presumably with many dreaming of erect penises. |
[NSFW:5f565db485]Source: Has nude artwork: http://www.scientificamerican.com/blog/post.cfm?id=sex-sleep-and-the-law-when-nocturna-2011-05-20[/NSFW:5f565db485]
Women always wonder why when traveling guys refuse to share beds and would rather just sleep apart on the floor or whatever, but anything to avoid being in the same bed. Does this answer it?
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The Opponent
Title: Forum Battle WINNER
Joined: Feb 24 2010
Location: The Danger Zone
Posts: 3495
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What about bisexuals?
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 I'm not a bad enough dude, but I am an edgy little shit. I'll do what I can. |
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Doddsino
Joined: Oct 01 2009
Posts: 5316
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I sleep on my stomach, so I always wake up nearly levitating.
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JRA
Joined: Sep 17 2007
Location: The Opium Trail
Posts: 3475
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Beavis & Butthead called this the morning wood fairy.
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 There are a lot of what if's in life Donny. What if I hit you really hard in the face, knocked yo shit to the back of yo skull? What if I....had you girl gargle my nuts? The fact remains, you are a fuckin mutant. |
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Blackout
Title: Captain Oblivious
Joined: Sep 01 2007
Location: That Rainy State
Posts: 10376
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Rolling over can be tricky sometimes.
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Drew Linky
Wizard
Joined: Jun 12 2009
Posts: 4209
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So that's why we don't fall off the bed when we sleep.
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https://discord.gg/homestuck is where you can find me literally 99% of the time. Stop on by if you feel like it, we're a nice crowd. |
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Black Zarak
Title: Big Coffin Hunter
Joined: Feb 01 2006
Location: Phyrexia
Posts: 4098
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Wait, who's avoiding sleeping in the same bed with female friends now?
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REVIEWS, LEGOS, NONSENSE Check out Zarak's Barracks!
"Let that be a lesson to you, your family and everyone you've ever known..."
"Thanks to denial, I'm immortal!" |
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i'll_bite_your_ear
Title: Distillatoria
Joined: Jun 09 2010
Location: van down by the river
Posts: 3707
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Next time burglars break into my house at night, i gonna stab them with my erection.
Bang bang, you suckers!
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 it was the best of times
it was the blurst of times |
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Dr. Jeebus
Moderator
Title: SLF Harbinger of Death
Joined: Sep 03 2005
Location: Wakefield, MA
Posts: 5228
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Ice2SeeYou
Title: Sexual Tyrannosaurus
Joined: Sep 28 2008
Location: South of Heaven
Posts: 1761
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I wish nature understood that when my bladder is full, I don't want an erection. The two signals need to cancel each other out.
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 Sydlexia.com - Where miserable bastards meet to call each other retards. |
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Vovad
Joined: Apr 25 2011
Location: Orem, UT
Posts: 75
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i personally find that boners add an entertaining level of challenge to urination
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Ice2SeeYou
Title: Sexual Tyrannosaurus
Joined: Sep 28 2008
Location: South of Heaven
Posts: 1761
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Vovad wrote: |
i personally find that boners add an entertaining level of challenge to urination |
When I lived alone and was faced with this situation, I used to just pee straight into the shower against the wall tiles. Then I'd just turn the shower on to wash everything away.
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 Sydlexia.com - Where miserable bastards meet to call each other retards. |
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Black Zarak
Title: Big Coffin Hunter
Joined: Feb 01 2006
Location: Phyrexia
Posts: 4098
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Man, trying to piss through morning wood, that hurts.
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REVIEWS, LEGOS, NONSENSE Check out Zarak's Barracks!
"Let that be a lesson to you, your family and everyone you've ever known..."
"Thanks to denial, I'm immortal!" |
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aika
Title: Narcissist
Joined: Apr 25 2008
Location: On the table.
Posts: 2041
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Wow, this thread is just...
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 天上天下唯我独尊 |
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Andrew Man
Title: Is a Funklord
Joined: Jan 30 2007
Location: Annandale, VA
Posts: 5603
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Klimbatize
2010 NES Champ
Title: 2011 Picnic/Death Champ
Joined: Mar 15 2010
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Posts: 4997
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We're only erect for 20% of sleep time? That seems low.
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aika
Title: Narcissist
Joined: Apr 25 2008
Location: On the table.
Posts: 2041
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Andrew Man wrote: |
aika wrote: |
Wow, this thread is just...  |
Everything is true. |
I'm learning more and more about the opposite sex every day.
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 天上天下唯我独尊 |
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Vovad
Joined: Apr 25 2011
Location: Orem, UT
Posts: 75
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Ice2SeeYou wrote: |
Vovad wrote: |
i personally find that boners add an entertaining level of challenge to urination |
When I lived alone and was faced with this situation, I used to just pee straight into the shower against the wall tiles. Then I'd just turn the shower on to wash everything away. |
i am currently living alone and will experiment with this solution myself
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The Flaming Schnitzel
Title: Tsar of all Russias
Joined: May 10 2011
Location: Minsk, Belarus
Posts: 810
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aika wrote: |
Andrew Man wrote: |
aika wrote: |
Wow, this thread is just...  |
Everything is true. |
I'm learning more and more about the opposite sex every day.  |
This.
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Drew Linky
Wizard
Joined: Jun 12 2009
Posts: 4209
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Morning wood presents no difficulties for me, other than avoiding the rest of the house for a few minutes. I hate wearing sweat pants in the morning.
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https://discord.gg/homestuck is where you can find me literally 99% of the time. Stop on by if you feel like it, we're a nice crowd. |
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Blackout
Title: Captain Oblivious
Joined: Sep 01 2007
Location: That Rainy State
Posts: 10376
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Well it's already gone too far as it is, might as well take it past the point of no return...
Anyone else ever notice that morning wood is damn near impervious to "stimuli"? Best time to put in work in my experience.
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Ice2SeeYou
Title: Sexual Tyrannosaurus
Joined: Sep 28 2008
Location: South of Heaven
Posts: 1761
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Blackout wrote: |
Well it's already gone too far as it is, might as well take it past the point of no return...
Anyone else ever notice that morning wood is damn near impervious to "stimuli"? Best time to put in work in my experience. |
That's true......it's not a "horny" boner. It's just kinda there.
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 Sydlexia.com - Where miserable bastards meet to call each other retards. |
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Atma
Title: Dragoon
Joined: Apr 29 2010
Location: Cincinnati, OH
Posts: 2450
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Ice2SeeYou wrote: |
Blackout wrote: |
Well it's already gone too far as it is, might as well take it past the point of no return...
Anyone else ever notice that morning wood is damn near impervious to "stimuli"? Best time to put in work in my experience. |
That's true......it's not a "horny" boner. It's just kinda there. |
Usually as soon as I piss, within a minute it's gone away.
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Drew Linky
Wizard
Joined: Jun 12 2009
Posts: 4209
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Blackout wrote: |
Well it's already gone too far as it is, might as well take it past the point of no return...
Anyone else ever notice that morning wood is damn near impervious to "stimuli"? Best time to put in work in my experience. |
I can't count morning wood as a boner, it doesn't have that same meaningful existence. It's more like an annoying roommate than anything.
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https://discord.gg/homestuck is where you can find me literally 99% of the time. Stop on by if you feel like it, we're a nice crowd. |
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i'll_bite_your_ear
Title: Distillatoria
Joined: Jun 09 2010
Location: van down by the river
Posts: 3707
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I never really noticed that. Gotta check that out!
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 it was the best of times
it was the blurst of times |
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