SydLexia.com - The Forums :: View topic - Man arrested in bra, panties, accused of stabbing goat.

Posted: May 04 2011 09:55 am

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/42887887/ns/us_news-weird_news/

You read the title of the article and things just go straight downhill from there.

Quote:

CHARLESTON, W.Va. — A West Virginia man found wearing women's underwear and standing over a goat's carcass told police he was high on bath salts.

Mark L. Thompson of Alum Creek was arrested at his home Monday. A criminal complaint in Kanawha County Magistrate Court charges the 19-year-old with cruelty to animals.

Sheriff's Deputy J.S. Shackelford says witnesses reported Thompson standing near a neighbor's pygmy goat in a bedroom. He was wearing a bra and female underwear. The goat, a male named Bailey, had at least one stab wound.

Cpl. Sean Snuffer said Thompson indicated he had been high and "wasn't in his right mind."

Thompson was held on $50,000 bond Tuesday at the South Central Regional Jail. Jail records didn't indicate whether he had an attorney and no listed phone number was available.

Neighbor Lisa Powers said she bought the goat on Friday as a gift for her 4-year-old grandson, The Charleston Gazette reported.

"The baby just loved him," she told The Gazette.

...

Officers found the small gray and white goat wearing a pink collar lying dead on the floor, blood coming from its neck, according to the complaint, The Gazette reported. There was a pornographic magazine photo lying a few feet from the goat, the complaint said.

I have about a million questions as to what was going on in that bedroom. Why was there porn? Why was he wearing women's underwear? Did he... you know... do anything to the goat, or did he just kill it? Is there any significance to the goat being male? Do bath salts really fuck you up that badly?

So many questions.

Joined: Jun 29 2010 Posts: 1818

Short answer: D:
Long answer: What? D:

Posted: May 04 2011 10:23 am

Porno, Goats, and women's underwear... the recipe for DISASTER! :O

Joined: Aug 04 2009 Posts: 2515

"Neighbor Lisa Powers said she bought the goat on Friday as a gift for her 4-year-old grandson"

Why? Just why? Timmy why can't you have a normal pet like everyone else.

Posted: May 04 2011 11:12 am

It sounds like a regular day at my previous job.

Posted: May 04 2011 11:21 am

@om*d wrote:

It sounds like a regular day at my previous job.

I find myself intensely eager to hear stories about your previous job.

Posted: May 04 2011 11:30 am

Whenever I finally get around to putting my website back online, they will be there, along with the stories from other jobs I have had.

I will give a small preview, though.

I once worked at a Taco Bell for one day when I was around 12 years old. I was the guy in a taco costume standing out front waving to people driving by. Since I was not old enough to work legally, I got paid in food. I ended up selling food for lower prices(black market Taco Bell, lol) in the parking lot behind the Taco Bell and they lost a lot of business that day. I also was throwing burritos at the Wendy's across the street, which caused them to call the police, who came down and yelled at me, and then I got fired, lol. I ended up in the paper for that one, under a strange news section with the story title of "Bad Taco Beans Wendy's".

Ah, memories...

Posted: May 04 2011 11:31 am

The Navy put out a big message about Bath Salts and the Synthetic Marijuana (Spice stuff).

Apparently certain Bath Salts can give you the same High as Crystal Meth, its not controlled, and its cheaper.

Posted: May 04 2011 11:33 am

@om*d wrote:

Whenever I finally get around to putting my website back online, they will be there, along with the stories from other jobs I have had.

I will give a small preview, though.

I once worked at a Taco Bell for one day when I was around 12 years old. I was the guy in a taco costume standing out front waving to people driving by. Since I was not old enough to work legally, I got paid in food. I ended up selling food for lower prices(black market Taco Bell, lol) in the parking lot behind the Taco Bell and they lost a lot of business that day. I also was throwing burritos at the Wendy's across the street, which caused them to call the police, who came down and yelled at me, and then I got fired, lol. I ended up in the paper for that one, under a strange news section with the story title of "Bad Taco Beans Wendy's".

Ah, memories...

I need more :O

Joined: Oct 01 2009 Posts: 5316

@om*d wrote:

Whenever I finally get around to putting my website back online, they will be there, along with the stories from other jobs I have had.

I will give a small preview, though.

I once worked at a Taco Bell for one day when I was around 12 years old. I was the guy in a taco costume standing out front waving to people driving by. Since I was not old enough to work legally, I got paid in food. I ended up selling food for lower prices(black market Taco Bell, lol) in the parking lot behind the Taco Bell and they lost a lot of business that day. I also was throwing burritos at the Wendy's across the street, which caused them to call the police, who came down and yelled at me, and then I got fired, lol. I ended up in the paper for that one, under a strange news section with the story title of "Bad Taco Beans Wendy's".

Ah, memories...

Wasn't that a Late Show segment? Letterman even chose Taco Bell.

Posted: May 04 2011 06:42 pm

This is going to ruin that guys resume.

Pygmy goats are awesome, they're so tiny!

Posted: May 04 2011 06:46 pm

Atma wrote:

The Navy put out a big message about Bath Salts and the Synthetic Marijuana (Spice stuff).

Apparently certain Bath Salts can give you the same High as Crystal Meth, its not controlled, and its cheaper.

I am really surprised I didn't know about bath salts. I wouldn't ever do them. I've been desperate before (computer cleaner [works], catnip [doesn't work], banana peels [mixed results]), but I wouldn't ever do bath salts.

Also, that poor fucking baby goat. I hate that dickface.

Posted: May 04 2011 06:48 pm

I wonder about the mindset of people who are so desperate to get high they start doing random shit around the house. Bath salts never would have entered into my list of possibilities.

Joined: May 22 2008 Location: Goshen, VA Posts: 6544

Well he IS from Virginia's tumor (West Virginia).

Posted: May 04 2011 06:52 pm

Virgina's tumor? I didn't know it was called that. :3

Posted: May 04 2011 06:53 pm

aeonic wrote:

I am really surprised I didn't know about bath salts. I wouldn't ever do them. I've been desperate before (computer cleaner [works], catnip [doesn't work], banana peels [mixed results]), but I wouldn't ever do bath salts.

Also, that poor fucking baby goat. I hate that dickface.

Apparently it's a new thing. It's made as bath salts. But they know the ingredient inside gets people high.

Just like spice is "not for human consumption" and is an Incense.

Joined: May 22 2008 Location: Goshen, VA Posts: 6544

Well I just grabbed that phrase out of mid-air but I'm sure other people call it that as well.

Don't get me wrong, it's a beautiful place that doesn't deserve most of it's bad reputation, but the places that DO deserve a bad reputation are fucking awful.

Posted: May 04 2011 07:34 pm

joshwoodzy wrote:

Well he IS from Virginia's tumor (West Virginia).

It's more like Virginia's hemorrhoid.

Posted: May 04 2011 09:05 pm

Atma wrote:

aeonic wrote:

I am really surprised I didn't know about bath salts. I wouldn't ever do them. I've been desperate before (computer cleaner [works], catnip [doesn't work], banana peels [mixed results]), but I wouldn't ever do bath salts.

Also, that poor fucking baby goat. I hate that dickface.

Apparently it's a new thing. It's made as bath salts. But they know the ingredient inside gets people high.

Just like spice is "not for human consumption" and is an Incense.

See, spice at least I can appreciate a little more because the materials it contains are, for the most part, natural except for the artificial cannabinoids. Now, the salts, they're probably what, alkaloid derivatives? It just seems kind of impossible to me that it would be pleasant, at all, but if it gets you fucked up enough to go tranny and kill a fucking goat, I guess it really doesn't matter. They need some more serious regulation on that stuff, or possibly to reconsider laws on some of the other things the American public consumes, that way there's not dangerous artificial shit like whatever that shitclown was smoking floating around out there.

Posted: May 04 2011 09:20 pm

Klimbatize wrote:

joshwoodzy wrote:

Well he IS from Virginia's tumor (West Virginia).

It's more like Virginia's hemorrhoid.

It's like New Jersey is the Armpit of America... smells like one too.

Wizard Joined: Jun 12 2009 Posts: 4209

Missouri is like...

Well, fucked if I know what it is. But it's not generally well liked by non-Missourians. Especially people from Kansas. KU zealots can suck my dick.

Posted: May 04 2011 10:22 pm

Slayer1 wrote:

Klimbatize wrote:

joshwoodzy wrote:

Well he IS from Virginia's tumor (West Virginia).

It's more like Virginia's hemorrhoid.

It's like New Jersey is the Armpit of America... smells like one too.

West virginia can be summed up with one experience i had with a "west virginian" He fucked his cousin, i rest my case.

Posted: May 04 2011 10:31 pm

aeonic computer duster is really bad for you, didn't you ever see Intervention?

Comparing one form of inhalant abuse with another is another is like deciding what's safer, competitive broken glass consumption, or recreational conscious bear neutering.

Posted: May 04 2011 10:51 pm

arizona is your dirty, racist uncle.

Joined: Jun 08 2010 Location: Termina Field Posts: 1541

I find the title of this thread funny. The actual news story makes me say "...What? WHAT!?

"