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I can't burp!


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JoshWoodzy
Joined: May 22 2008
Location: Goshen, VA
PostPosted: Sep 10 2009 05:52 pm Reply with quote Back to top

So I know this sounds like a weird and almost impossible problem, but I lack the ability to make myself burp. I can probably count on one hand how many times I involuntarily burp a year. So consequently I get full REALLY fast and have an extreme indigestion problem.

People don't usually believe me and think that I could make myself but I don't know how. I tried all of my childhood to make myself burp and all I could do was vomit. Not as impressive to a group of friends having a burping contest.

So I guess I'm just asking if anyone has a similar problem or can suggest ways to help alleviate the extreme indigestion. I take the chewy Rolaids and they kick ass, but some cases are more extreme.


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Douche McCallister
Moderator
Title: DOO-SHAY
Joined: Jan 26 2007
Location: Private Areas
PostPosted: Sep 10 2009 05:57 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Well if you can make yourself throw up just make a burp noise during/afterwords and say wow that was powerful. You should win every burping contest from then on.


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Rydog
Title: Dragon Slayer
Joined: Aug 11 2009
Location: Massachusetts
PostPosted: Sep 10 2009 05:58 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Drink seltzer water, that may help.
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username
Title: owner of a lonely heart
Joined: Jul 06 2007
Location: phoenix, az usa
PostPosted: Sep 10 2009 06:45 pm Reply with quote Back to top

so, josh, seems like you're full of it... eh.


Klimbatize wrote:
I'll eat a turkey sandwich while blowing my load

 
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Eddie_Hyde
Title: Ernie with the Disposal
Joined: Apr 13 2009
Location: Gulag
PostPosted: Sep 10 2009 07:30 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Aren't there many more things to be concerned with?


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MOGHARR
Title: The Original CandyWafer
Joined: Apr 05 2007
Location: Under Jolly Roger
PostPosted: Sep 10 2009 08:05 pm Reply with quote Back to top

I can't make myself burp either. What exactly do you mean? I thought they just kind of...happened.


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"Well I don`t judge most things by graphics, reality has amazing graphics, and I don`t like it, that`s why I play video games." Laminated Sky on Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker
 
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Rydog
Title: Dragon Slayer
Joined: Aug 11 2009
Location: Massachusetts
PostPosted: Sep 10 2009 08:13 pm Reply with quote Back to top

I can, I guess you just can or you can't.
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GPFontaine
Joined: Dec 06 2007
Location: Connecticut
PostPosted: Sep 10 2009 08:14 pm Reply with quote Back to top

Eddie_Hyde wrote:
Aren't there many more things to be concerned with?

No, this is the most important thing.

To try and fake a burp, you could gulp air. Pretend you have liquid in your mouth and gulp. If that doesn't work, try a carbonated beverage. May I suggest beer?



 
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username
Title: owner of a lonely heart
Joined: Jul 06 2007
Location: phoenix, az usa
PostPosted: Sep 10 2009 09:42 pm Reply with quote Back to top

GPFontaine wrote:
Eddie_Hyde wrote:
Aren't there many more things to be concerned with?

No, this is the most important thing.

To try and fake a burp, you could gulp air. Pretend you have liquid in your mouth and gulp. If that doesn't work, try a carbonated beverage. May I suggest beer?

yup, thats what i do to force myself to burp.


Klimbatize wrote:
I'll eat a turkey sandwich while blowing my load

 
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lavalarva
2011 SNES Champ
Joined: Dec 04 2006
PostPosted: Sep 11 2009 12:00 am Reply with quote Back to top

I can't burp either, unless I drink Coke or stuff like that, but that's not too awesome when your stomach hurts because it's so fucking full of air.
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SoldierHawk
Moderator
Title: Warrior-Poet
Joined: Jan 15 2009
Location: San Diego, CA
PostPosted: Sep 11 2009 12:56 am Reply with quote Back to top

I've spent an embarassing amount of time trying to teach myself to burp on purpose. No dice so far.

I don't have any trouble with the involuntary ones, so I dunno. Confused I tried googling it, but mostly found a lot of people complaining about the same symptom. This was the most useful thing I found: http://www.medhelp.org/posts/Gastroenterology/Inability-to-burp/show/233929


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Blackout
Title: Captain Oblivious
Joined: Sep 01 2007
Location: That Rainy State
PostPosted: Sep 13 2009 11:00 am Reply with quote Back to top

GPFontaine wrote:
Eddie_Hyde wrote:
Aren't there many more things to be concerned with?

No, this is the most important thing.

To try and fake a burp, you could gulp air.

Is it normal if one can do this with their ass? Confused



 
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Slayer1
Title: ,,!,, for you know who
Joined: Sep 23 2008
PostPosted: Sep 13 2009 11:06 am Reply with quote Back to top

I'm assuming it's genetic much like a person can roll thier tongues and others can't.
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JoshWoodzy
Joined: May 22 2008
Location: Goshen, VA
PostPosted: Sep 13 2009 11:36 am Reply with quote Back to top

Blackout,

I have seen such horrors at small town carnivals, and I hear it's pretty lucrative.

Slayer,

I forgot to mention that my mom also lacks the ability to burp, but both my sisters and my father have no problem.


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Blackout
Title: Captain Oblivious
Joined: Sep 01 2007
Location: That Rainy State
PostPosted: Sep 13 2009 01:03 pm Reply with quote Back to top

So wait, I can get paid dirty money to fart on command?



 
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Slayer1
Title: ,,!,, for you know who
Joined: Sep 23 2008
PostPosted: Sep 13 2009 01:49 pm Reply with quote Back to top

joshwoodzell wrote:
Blackout,

I have seen such horrors at small town carnivals, and I hear it's pretty lucrative.

Slayer,

I forgot to mention that my mom also lacks the ability to burp, but both my sisters and my father have no problem.

Could be recessive genes in you. your sisters could have inherited the dominant and according to a punett square you must have gotten the recessive...
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