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2011 SNES Champ Joined: Dec 04 2006 Posts: 1929

Post why Mario is cool or not.

Cool because:

He can jump about five times his height
He can shoot fireballs
He wins over a giant turtle monster
He is red
He eats mushrooms
He's not afraid of fire/lava
He's good in many sports

Not cool because:

He is hurt by simply touching a goomba
He must use a lot of lives to beat bowser (cheating)
He's smaller than Toads
He can live only 5 minutes in a level
We don't know why he's not a mushroom thing even if he lives in the mushroom kingdom (Apparently, even Peach's father is a Toad).

Posted: Dec 13 2006 11:11 pm

Mario's cool. He's a big money player, or so I've been told.

Posted: Dec 13 2006 11:28 pm

Indeed he is.

He's the one that taught us that doing drugs is good for you! Mario

Posted: Dec 14 2006 12:04 am

I thought Pac Man taught us doing drugs was good for us? Wait, no, that taught us that doing drugs turned us into carniverous psychotics who hallucinate colors.

Anyway, the thing that's so cool about Mario is that after the games were over, he got fat and went to seed and Luigi started fucking the princess.

Posted: Dec 14 2006 01:11 am

This kind of says it all:

Posted: Dec 14 2006 01:15 am

Okay, Mario's so cool he can multiply the chicks that dig him? That is an awesome pic though.

Title: Nothing Special Joined: Oct 25 2006 Posts: 396

Knyte, if I ever open an office somewhere, I'm consigning you to make the motivational posters my minions will walk by on the way to their cubicles.

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

please tell me the story behind that picture.

Posted: Dec 14 2006 01:51 am

JEW wrote:

please tell me the story behind that picture.

DOA gives Nintendo some love. It was a promotional pic someone made when it was anounced the Tecmo was making Super Swing Golf for the Wii, and that the DOA girls would be in it.

Posted: Dec 14 2006 04:56 am

Promotional pic my ass, some loser threw it together in 10 seconds flat in Garry's Mod for half life 2. That's gm_construct that they're on. It's just a random picture that happened to get popular, despite there being hundreds of funnier and better quality ones out there, as is the theme with Gmod pics.

Long story short, different people converted kasumi, Mario and that other bitch to Gmod, then some other random guy made said uncreative / unfunny picture.

Why is it unfunny, you ask, because it's an obvious and no-effort pic. I hate no-effort Gmod pics. They bore the shit out of me, having made things hundreds of times funnier with real effort. Sorry Embarrassed

Knowing the science behind simplistic Gmod pics makes them not funny for me. Yay!

Posted: Dec 14 2006 05:05 am

lavalarva wrote:

We don't know why he's not a mushroom thing even if he lives in the mushroom kingdom (Apparently, even Peach's father is a Toad).

I thought we knew exactly why: he and Luigi were Brooklyn plumbers who, while doing routine work, inexplicably fell down/were swallowed up by a magical warp pipe that took them from our world the Mushroom Kingdom

Joined: Apr 14 2006 Location: Lake Michigan Posts: 3332

Mario has been dominating Luigi for years, not allowing him to enter the Plumbers' Union. So, Mario sucks.

Actually, me and my friends growing up all hated Mario and liked Luigi, and then Wario. I'd always pick one of those two for games Like Mario Kart , Golf, or Tennis.

Posted: Dec 14 2006 10:39 am

Mario kicks ass because he kills turtles and midgets for fun.

2011 SNES Champ Joined: Dec 04 2006 Posts: 1929

Chrisby wrote:

Indeed he is.

He's the one that taught us that doing drugs is good for you! Mario

I'm not quite sure what you're refering to.
Well, in Donkey Kong, DK would challenge Mario by saying "How high can you get?"
I'll just assume you were talking about that.

Joined: Feb 24 2006 Posts: 2578

Chrisby is referring, I believe, to Mario's use of mushrooms. 1-UP

Posted: Dec 14 2006 12:03 pm

A lot of old games had drug references.

For example, Pac-Man popped pills in the dark while listening to repetitive music.

Posted: Dec 14 2006 01:16 pm

Char Aznable wrote:

A lot of old games had drug references.

For example, Pac-Man popped pills in the dark while listening to repetitive music.

It's fun to steal quotes!

Posted: Dec 14 2006 01:27 pm

Nick Swardson!

(I think)

Posted: Dec 14 2006 02:39 pm

If Ron Jeremey believes, so do I!

Joined: Feb 24 2006 Posts: 2578

Now that's an endorsement for Nintendo to be proud of. Very Happy

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

MegaManFan1234BlasterCool wrote:

Promotional pic my ass, some loser threw it together in 10 seconds flat in Garry's Mod for half life 2. That's gm_construct that they're on. It's just a random picture that happened to get popular, despite there being hundreds of funnier and better quality ones out there, as is the theme with Gmod pics.

Long story short, different people converted kasumi, Mario and that other bitch to Gmod, then some other random guy made said uncreative / unfunny picture.

Why is it unfunny, you ask, because it's an obvious and no-effort pic. I hate no-effort Gmod pics. They bore the shit out of me, having made things hundreds of times funnier with real effort. Sorry Embarrassed

Knowing the science behind simplistic Gmod pics makes them not funny for me. Yay!

I suppose repeating gifs with fart noises would improve it a hundred percent.

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

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also, the instruction bookelt says that the people of hte muchroom kingdom were either turned into goombas or were turned into stars and mushrooms and shit, and trapped in boxes. mario breaks open the boxes and frees the citizens and tehy grant mario some of their power to help him.

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Posted: Dec 14 2006 05:29 pm

Have any of you guys played Superstar Saga, Partners In Time, or Luigi's Mansion? Luigi's kind of a wuss. Even a slight breeze can send him running away crying, and then Mario or Baby Luigi has to slap some sense into him.

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

he makes up for it by saving mario's ass in luigi's mansion.

Posted: Dec 14 2006 05:33 pm

Is Luigi's Mansion considered canon though? You fight Undead Bowser and Bowser is very much alive. Or maybe it was Robot Bowser, I forget. It's been forever since I played it.