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Fighter_McWarrior
Title: Gun of Brixton
Joined: Jun 05 2011
Location: Down by the River
Posts: 1087
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Hey, all.
By the end of next week (hopefully) I'll have completed my first novel of what will hopefully be a series. It's close to 140 pages, and I would really appreciate that anyone interested in taking the time to read it. Like A Song of Ice and Fire (Game of Thrones), it's a political fantasy, but it's set in the technological era of the industrial 1920s. It follows the lives of 6 people to examine how they're drawn into a conflict that eventually becomes a full blown civil war. There's also a musical element to it, as every chapter title comes from a song in the 20s era and each character has an American roots genre theme (Ragtime, jazz, folk, blues ect...)
Right now the book's in several pieces. When I finish the last few chapters I have for it, and assemble them, I'll post the link to my Google Doc that it's written in here. Please let me know if any of you are interested in taking a peek at it. Bear in mind that this is my first full length work, and that it's still a bit on the rough draft side. I want constructive criticism, but please be gentle.
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"Spanish bombs, yot' quierro y finito
Yo te querda oh ma corazón
Oh ma corazón, oh ma corazón" - The Clash, Spanish Bombs |
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@om*d
Title: Dorakyura
Joined: Jul 10 2010
Location: Castlevania
Posts: 4224
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The setting sounds interesting as well as the characters. I would be interested in reading and offering some constructive criticism.
Also, good work on writing a novel!
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Valdronius
Moderator
Title: SydLexia COO
Joined: Aug 22 2005
Location: The Great White North
Posts: 4459
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I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine.
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Klimbatize wrote: |
A Hispanic dude living in Arizona knows a lot of Latinas? That's fucking odd. |
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username
Title: owner of a lonely heart
Joined: Jul 06 2007
Location: phoenix, az usa
Posts: 16123
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Valdronius wrote: |
I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine. |
reminded me of this
Quote: |
Mr. Burns: We don't have to be adversaries, Homer. We both want a fair union contract.
Homer: [thinking] Why is Mr. Burns being so nice to me?
Mr. Burns: And if you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours.
Homer: [thinking] Wait a minute. Is he coming onto me?
Mr. Burns: I mean, if I should slip something into your pocket, what's the harm?
Homer: [thinking] My God! He IS coming onto me!
Mr. Burns: After all, negotiations make strange bedfellows.
[chuckle]
Mr. Burns: [wink]
Homer: [thinking] Aaaaaagh!
Homer: [aloud] Sorry, Mr. Burns, but I don't go in for these backdoor shenanigans. Sure, I'm flattered, maybe even a little curious, but the answer is no! |
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Klimbatize wrote: |
I'll eat a turkey sandwich while blowing my load |
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Fighter_McWarrior
Title: Gun of Brixton
Joined: Jun 05 2011
Location: Down by the River
Posts: 1087
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Valdronius wrote: |
I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine. |
Gladly. Point me in the direction of your stuff and I'll start taking a look at it now.
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"Spanish bombs, yot' quierro y finito
Yo te querda oh ma corazón
Oh ma corazón, oh ma corazón" - The Clash, Spanish Bombs |
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Etch
Title: Intermittent Scribbler
Joined: Mar 15 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 588
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Question: I've never used Google Docs, is there a way to download as a .pdf so I won't have to read it on my computer?
Also, do you want feedback in a private message or posted in the thread?
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It is a waste of politeness to be courteous to the devil ~ William L. Garrison
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Fighter_McWarrior
Title: Gun of Brixton
Joined: Jun 05 2011
Location: Down by the River
Posts: 1087
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Feel free to post it in the thread. I got nothing to hide.
As for the downloading, I'll just email it to you in that case. Do you have Word, because that's how its being written now. I'd have to convert to PDF (which isn't a problem, per say)
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"Spanish bombs, yot' quierro y finito
Yo te querda oh ma corazón
Oh ma corazón, oh ma corazón" - The Clash, Spanish Bombs |
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Etch
Title: Intermittent Scribbler
Joined: Mar 15 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 588
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Yeah, I've got Word and can convert it on my end. I'll message you an email address when you announce the finished product.
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It is a waste of politeness to be courteous to the devil ~ William L. Garrison
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Fighter_McWarrior
Title: Gun of Brixton
Joined: Jun 05 2011
Location: Down by the River
Posts: 1087
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Thanks everyone
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"Spanish bombs, yot' quierro y finito
Yo te querda oh ma corazón
Oh ma corazón, oh ma corazón" - The Clash, Spanish Bombs |
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i'll_bite_your_ear
Title: Distillatoria
Joined: Jun 09 2010
Location: van down by the river
Posts: 3707
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I'm also interested in reading it. May you send it to me please?
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it was the best of times
it was the blurst of times |
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LeshLush
Joined: Oct 19 2009
Location: Nashville, TN
Posts: 1479
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I'll give it a look. How in depth do you want your feedback, and on what level?
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Fighter_McWarrior
Title: Gun of Brixton
Joined: Jun 05 2011
Location: Down by the River
Posts: 1087
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Man, I'm just grateful that anyone wants to read it, haha. I'm not going to dictate the terms you read it on. If you have any thoughts you wanna share, go right ahead.
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"Spanish bombs, yot' quierro y finito
Yo te querda oh ma corazón
Oh ma corazón, oh ma corazón" - The Clash, Spanish Bombs |
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LeshLush
Joined: Oct 19 2009
Location: Nashville, TN
Posts: 1479
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As a writer myself, I'm just trying to be helpful. I don't know what kinds of proofreaders you already have or where you are in the drafting stage. Tell us what you think an ideal level of proofreading would be. It may be that none of us can off that, but I'll at least do what I can and try to get as close as possible.
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Greg the White
Joined: Apr 09 2008
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3112
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Send me a link to the googledoc when you get the chance. I'd be really interested in it.
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So here's to you Mrs. Robinson. People love you more- oh, nevermind. |
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Cattivo
Joined: Apr 14 2006
Location: Lake Michigan
Posts: 3332
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Congrats dude. I've been trying to find the time and energy to write a novel for the past few years. Haven't gotten past word one, except in my head.
I'll take a look when it's available.
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Fighter_McWarrior
Title: Gun of Brixton
Joined: Jun 05 2011
Location: Down by the River
Posts: 1087
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LeshLush wrote: |
As a writer myself, I'm just trying to be helpful. I don't know what kinds of proofreaders you already have or where you are in the drafting stage. Tell us what you think an ideal level of proofreading would be. It may be that none of us can off that, but I'll at least do what I can and try to get as close as possible. |
Fair enough. I guess I hadn't thought of it that way and I really wasn't trying to be a smartass or anything. As far as the drafting stage goes, I'm on a very rough first draft right now that I'm going to tighten up once before I start sharing it.
I suppose what I'm looking for, in terms of feedback, is some general thoughts. Are the characters distinct? Does the story feel disjointed? (A big concern given my sizeable cast of characters) Are there any continuity errors I should know about? Does my story get interesting fast enough? Generally speaking, who's strong, who's weak and how do you think I can improve the narrative. My English major girlfriend is helping me with a lot of the technical stuff, and my brother's read everything I have so far as well, so that should all be in line. That said, if you catch anything that's extremely glaring or troubling, please let me know.
I may have been a bit optimistic when I said I'd be done at the end of the week. I'm adding at least one chapter that I hadn't expect to and probably a second. I'm also going back to redo the first few chapter of one of my perspective characters, as I'd created a plot device with him that I never used and has genuinely become pointless. After that, I'm going to read through the thing add in a few flavor details to spice things up. This is a fantasy world, after all, and I could use some more information on the magical elements and locations I'm using.
All in all, I'm going to tentatively expect to be done by next week. Possibly earlier. I still don't have much to do in terms of actually writing new material, so it shouldn't take a great deal of time. I'll keep you all posted.
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"Spanish bombs, yot' quierro y finito
Yo te querda oh ma corazón
Oh ma corazón, oh ma corazón" - The Clash, Spanish Bombs |
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JohnnyBenz
Title: The nip killer
Joined: Feb 08 2013
Location: Northeast MS
Posts: 318
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Wish you the best of luck Fighter! As an aspiring novelist myself I understand what a motherfuker of anundertaking it is. Personally, I've been working on a novel for the past year and have exactly 0 pages finished so, yeah...
I would offer to help with the feedback but I tend to lean toward the positive side of things and I'm not sure that's what you need. But I appluad you on seeing this thing through, and once you work out the kinks, if there are any, I'm sure there are people here who can help guide you through the process down the road to submit for publishing. Not sure you wanna do that but sounds like a great idea you have and would seem almost criminal not to give it a try. Anyway, wish you the best of luck!
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Etch
Title: Intermittent Scribbler
Joined: Mar 15 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 588
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Any update on the book, Fighter? I was looking forward to reading that.
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It is a waste of politeness to be courteous to the devil ~ William L. Garrison
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Fighter_McWarrior
Title: Gun of Brixton
Joined: Jun 05 2011
Location: Down by the River
Posts: 1087
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Ugh. I haven't touched it in a while. Which is frustrating becuase I'm so close to the end. I've started to go back and do some editing in hopes that it'll spur my forward momentum. The whole thing is a real frustration.
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"Spanish bombs, yot' quierro y finito
Yo te querda oh ma corazón
Oh ma corazón, oh ma corazón" - The Clash, Spanish Bombs |
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Fighter_McWarrior
Title: Gun of Brixton
Joined: Jun 05 2011
Location: Down by the River
Posts: 1087
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So, to update a little...I'm nowhere near done. I thought I was, but that was an illusion. The more I do back edits, the more I rewrite. The result is that I have a much better story, but it also means I'm further away from being finished.
When I'm satisfied with chapters, I might start posting in Google Docs again. If I decide to, and I also decide to share that as I go along, I'll post the links here.
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"Spanish bombs, yot' quierro y finito
Yo te querda oh ma corazón
Oh ma corazón, oh ma corazón" - The Clash, Spanish Bombs |
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