How come when you get Lon Lon milk as a child, it doesn't curdle when you use the Master Sword to go forward 7 years in time? Also, how come Gold Skulltulas you kill in the future cause members of the House of Skulltula to cease being cursed in the past?

Syd Lexia wrote:

In Wario: Master of Disguise, Wario ends up being the rapist who rapes himself. How is that even possible!?

Too many video games involve life/death mechanics. What if instead of life/death, we assessed failure in terms of raped/not-raped? Of course, video games in today's world cater to the communist youth who believe that from each according to his ability, to each according to everyone deserves to see the good ending, so we couldn't have a binary system. None of the modern pinko-trotskyite-brohug Madden fans appreciate the one hit and you die aesthetic of the Golden Era. Therefore, we'll say that Legitmate Rape is a one hit and you're raped (one hit kill for the imbeciles out there), and there's a sliding scale of lesser sexual offences to which you can be exposed. Maybe it takes fifty unsolicited moonings to equal one rape, but only three surprise handjobs (two if no lube or perpetratror has polydactyly). So, in essence, if you are about to finish a level in Wario: Master of Disguise but you don't have a high enough score, you can choose to "suicide" and replay the level by finding an old Coke bottle and sticking it real far up your ass. In this scenario, medkits would be replaced by the ability to summon Marvin Gaye, who would offer you sexual healing. Of course, the fagtards out there would want some sort of cover-based hymen-regen system, even though I have unequivocally proven both that Cover-Recover is a mechanic invented by Islamic Fundamentalists to keep America down, and that no amount of time will allow a hymen to grow back after it's punctured by an old Coke bottle (I have yet to test for Pepsi or Royal Crown).

username wrote:

Beach Bum wrote: LeshLush wrote: Syd Lexia wrote: In Wario: Master of Disguise, Wario ends up being the rapist who rapes himself. How is that even possible!? Too many video games involve life/death mechanics. What if instead of life/death, we assessed failure in terms of raped/not-raped? Of course, video games in today's world cater to the communist youth who believe that from each according to his ability, to each according to everyone deserves to see the good ending, so we couldn't have a binary system. None of the modern pinko-trotskyite-brohug Madden fans appreciate the one hit and you die aesthetic of the Golden Era. Therefore, we'll say that Legitmate Rape is a one hit and you're raped (one hit kill for the imbeciles out there), and there's a sliding scale of lesser sexual offences to which you can be exposed. Maybe it takes fifty unsolicited moonings to equal one rape, but only three surprise handjobs (two if no lube or perpetratror has polydactyly). So, in essence, if you are about to finish a level in Wario: Master of Disguise but you don't have a high enough score, you can choose to "suicide" and replay the level by finding an old Coke bottle and sticking it real far up your ass. In this scenario, medkits would be replaced by the ability to summon Marvin Gaye, who would offer you sexual healing. Of course, the fagtards out there would want some sort of cover-based hymen-regen system, even though I have unequivocally proven both that Cover-Recover is a mechanic invented by Islamic Fundamentalists to keep America down, and that no amount of time will allow a hymen to grow back after it's punctured by an old Coke bottle (I have yet to test for Pepsi of Royal Crown). Did Vert hack your account? nope, cuz that was actually funny & it made sense. also, it didnt involve beating up a white guy for sneezing in the hallway.

If I heard a white guy sneeze in a hallway, I'd just shove a can of Dr. Pepper up his rectum.

PLEASE DON'T MAKE THIS ABOUT RACE. IT WAS JUST AN EXAMPLE.

Black guys I'd probably use an empty mayonnaise jar.