Welcome once again to Fun With Search Engines, the weekly report where I show you some of the keywords that visitors to my site typed into Yahoo and other search engines. This FWSE report covers the week of November 6th - November 12th. Here it comes:
1. i’m not anyone lyrics sammy davis jr - You know, when I saw this, I was confused. I didn’t remember mentioning Sammy Davis Jr. at all. But I did. Did I also order an orchestra, possibly while stoned? No, that was Cypress Hill. If you want to know where Sammy’s name appears on the site, you can look it up yourself…
2. kristin cavalleri naked - Although it is too early to say for sure, I predict that in another week or so the searches for Kristin Cavallari porn will be replaced with searches for Kara Borden porn. That’s what the Vegas bookies are telling me anyway.
3. see free fatalities screenshots for mk2 - What, is someone charging for them? If so, what are the profit margins? This idea mildly intrigues me… Wait, no it doesn’t. Charging people for screenshots is even more retarded than charging people to use your forums. And I can’t think of a single popular site that does something as greedy and disingenuous as that.
4. why are there no super mario roms? - In attempt to feign legitimacy, big ROM sites such as ROM-World have decided that to take down games at the request of their manufacturers. The result is that it is now slightly more difficult to find the old games you’d actually WANT to play like Mega Man and Legend of Zelda. If you’re not totally inept, you’ll still be able to find these games with a little more digging. If not, you can still play the millions upon millions of crappy rom hacks of the classics. Super Nakio Brothers, anyone?
5. my daughter is fucking ablack dude - The obvious joke to make here would have been that if ablack were an actual word, that My Daughter Is Fucking Ablack Dude could be a porn site. As it turns out, it actually *is* a porn site and a mediocre one at that.
6. soccer difficult trivia questions - This search came from Ireland, a country where’s the actually such a thing as an easy soccer trivia question. Here in American, all soccer questions are hard because no one watches the damn thing. Of course, I thought soccer is generally called football in Europe. You know who I blame? Fucking emigrants, that’s who.
7. super mario land roms - I’m all for retrogaming, but Super Mario Land is not worth your time. It’s also not worth $2 of your hard earned cash, yet EB Games will charge you $9.99 for a used copy of it. Assholes.
Well, that’s it. Tune in next week for more random shit.