SydLexia.com - The Forums :: View topic - something I wrote eight years ago in math class...

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

not really much of anything. I was going through all of my old notebooks with a friend, and just figured I'd post some of it sporadically.

Quote:

Ninjas think they're cool because they're all agile and shit and it pisses me off! I hate their stupid flips, their jumps, and ALL of their corny acrobatics! Hell, I bet a samurai could take out like twenty of them without even breaking a sweat.

I hate their deception, their ninja magic, and their sneaky little ways of killing people. I hate how they always work in groups. They're a bunch of sissies who know they wouldn't win in a fair fight!

I hate their pesky little kunai and their shuriken, and I hate their flamboyant grace and the way that they can stand on the smallest of objects with the greatest of ease.I hate their ancient wisdom and their air of superiority.

Most of all I hate how they all look exactly the same so killing one makes no big deal, because there's never, EVER, just one at a time.

Want to hear something honestly? It felt GOOD to watch that rock dude kill all of those dudes in Ninja Scroll. It felt even better to see Jubei hack up all of those other dudes later in the film! I love watching Johnny Cage decapitate Sub-Zero, and I love seeing Brock Lesnar power bomb Jeff Hardy.

Yes, Jeff Hardy is a ninja. His high flying agility and barely heterosexual grace make him one.

I guess Scorpion from Mortal Kombat is okay though. I mean, he comes from Hell, and Hell is cool. Plus, he sets people on fire.

Posted: May 25 2010 12:15 am

I used to do little rants like that, I'll post some later if I can find them.

Posted: May 25 2010 12:16 am

lol u mustve been bored and pissed off to write that. quite funny though

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

yeah. A lot of my old material was terrible. it was pretty much just me writing whatever came to mind as it did. It was fun to write when I was fifteen, probably not so fun to read now that I'm twenty five.

Posted: May 25 2010 01:33 pm

u still feel the same about ninjas nowadays?

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

Not a fan, personally.

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

I wrote this four years after the ninja one, so I'd like to say that I've improved:

Quote:

Dear Daniel,

I've rewritten this several times because I don't know how to begin, and finally I've decided to just jump into what I have to say.

I'm sure that by the time you read this it will only leave you confused and doubtful, perhaps torn, and I won't be here to convince you of my sincerity. As I lay here on my deathbed, mostly alone, I realize that I was wrong. I was wrong about everything.

I remember when you and your sister Louise were very young. By then your father and I were separated, but he still had visitation rights. Those visits didn't last long, as I couldn't bear the sight of him long enough to let my own children get to know their father.

I've always told you that your father was an evil man, and that he didn't care about you. To be honest, he didn't fight very hard to try and see you, but I only thought about myself when I sent you to live with that same devil at the tender age of thirteen. I don't know how he treated you or what he did to you, but I never stopped to think about how our personal vendetta affected you or your sister, and never once did I place blame on myself.

I admit that your father and I weren't ready to be parents at the ages of nineteen and twenty, and after your father left I was more concerned with trying to still live my own life than I was with trying to help you with yours.

I suppose at such a young age, the hatred that I had for your father made me view his offspring as more of a burden than as the miracles that you were. Maybe if you had been born at a later time of my life, or were the seed of a nobler man, you might have been happier, but there is no way to know.

I never thought about your difficulties with people, your struggles with social situations, your lack of understanding of the opposite sex. I've always written these things off as a learning disability. I now believe that spending more time with you, nurturing you more, would have benefited you greatly.

I remember when you were older, living with me again in my old age, my own life now wasted. I looked upon you like I saw your father so many years ago. It was unfair. Here you were, at an age where you should have been out enjoying your youth, Ironically the same age as when I had you, working to support me and your younger brother Anthony.

Oh, how you loved Anthony. Oh, how I used him against you. Just like I used you and your sister against your father. Every time you left and said you'd never come back, every time I had the police remove you from the house, every time you spent the night on the street, you always returned the next morning, apologetic for things that weren't your fault, ready to try again.

I can only imagine what went through your troubled mind while you wandered the cold streets at night. I did not know until much later that with your spirit broken, you had tried to kill yourself twice.

Your sister tells me that you're happy now. You're a writer, and you're engaged to an artist. This may come as a surprise, but I am happy for you. I know that you don't make a lot of money, and Louise tells me that you work in a factory to get by, but I am not ashamed of you. I am not disappointed that you weren't more enthusiastic about opportunities to better yourself. I am only upset with myself for not encouraging you more. The last thing that Louise told me in our short visit is that for the first time in your life, you are truly happy.

I know that a lot of your writing is about me. I feel mixed about this to be honest. I am deeply saddened that I have affected you on such a deep emotional level, but on another side, I am also humbled by the fact that my actions at least gave you inspiration. Lastly, I am proud of you for venting in such a creative way.

I don't know if you will decide to have children with your fiancee, but I have faith in your ability to learn from the past. The life ahead of you will be trying, but I have faith in you. Never lose sight of what is in your heart, and never let yourself become bitter like I have. I know that I can't leave you anything more than this letter and painful funeral arrangements, but I beg you to heed my advice. Never let your heart grow cold to the world around you, and try to experience everything that life has to offer.

I am terribly sorry that I won't be around to watch you establish a life for yourself, but perhaps it's better this way. Life will sometimes hurt you, but know that I truly, deeply love you, even if I have lost sight of that until now.

Your mother, Sue

Posted: Jun 06 2010 03:12 pm

^ lol wtf?!

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

It may or may not be a true story.

I have a giant box of random writings.

Joined: Jun 09 2010 Posts: 10

I'd like to know the quality of your math.

Joined: Oct 01 2009 Posts: 5316

How are you already in the NWO?

Title: Comic Author Joined: Dec 12 2008 Posts: 1179

I told him to join, so he could get to my book links. He needs them to join the D&D game tonight.

Posted: Jun 11 2010 05:17 pm

Doddsino wrote:

How are you already in the NWO?

You only have to ask to get in. Not that hard.

Joined: Oct 01 2009 Posts: 5316

I can understand asking and such, but I always figured there should be a small intermission period where people at least know what kind of a person you are before you're granted access, that's all. It's all good.

Title: Titlating Joined: Dec 17 2007 Posts: 5042

A lot of people assume that, but the NWO isn't like some super serious part of the forum. I think we are more likely to know who someone is if they post in a forum without rules more-so than one with.

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

Well I figure if he's a douche, I would just edit his posts or revoke his membership.

Title: Titlating Joined: Dec 17 2007 Posts: 5042

That too

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

Lusit wrote:

I'd like to know the quality of your math.

my math his terrible, which is hilariouse, considering my career path requires math skills.

Posted: Aug 01 2010 10:59 am

You know, FNJ, I know a cool ninja.

Also, NECROTHREADS

Joined: May 22 2008 Location: Goshen, VA Posts: 6544

Does anyone else feel like you get AIDS just by looking at the cretins in that video?

Joined: Dec 06 2008 Location: Pearland, TX Posts: 88

^^^ Ha ha seriously. But really though, what the fuck is that?

2010 SLF Tag Champ Joined: Jun 07 2006 Posts: 12294

Won't play on my iPod.

Posted: Aug 02 2010 05:19 am

That's a person suffering from progeria, you cold motherfucker.

Posted: Oct 21 2010 01:06 pm

So um, necro-double-post.

Ninja got some friends and, um, well, they made another video. Yyyyeah.

There's actually a story behind this Wanga guy and what he's singing about (the part with the subtitles.) See, he's rapping in Xhosa (and he's one of them), and the wacky Xhosa have this rite of passage where the boy is being taken into the bush, where he's circumcised with a knife (no aneasthesia, no hygiene involved). Then he's supposed to live in the bush for a prolonged period of time, rubbing white ash from a fire into his dick wound. So this Wanga dude resisted it and he's ostracized because of it. So yeah. He's an old boy, so to speak.