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Posted: Mar 06 2006 05:55 pm

This week's Entertainment Weekly (yucky) ran an article about the 25 worst sequels ever made. They claimed that the list's criteria was: fall in quality over the first, unnecessarity it was needed, and nothing that was "so bad it's good" is on the list. I completely disagree with many of these selections. I'll post my list later, but for now I'll just transcribe their crappy list:

25. The Matrix Reloaded (claiming Revolutions was worst, but Reloaded was a painful blow no one expected)
24. The Next Karate Kid
23. Porky's II: The Next Day
22. Teen Wolf Two
21. Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde
20. The Godfather Part III
19. Revenge of the Nerds II: Nerds in Paradise
18. Battle For The Planet of the Apes
17. Star Trek V: The Final Frontier
16. Ocean's Twelve
15. Dumb and Dumberer: When Harry Met Lloyd
14. Conan The Destroyer (which I will say breaks their "so bad it's good" clause)
13. The Sting II
12. Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace
11. Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights
10. Jaws: The Revenge
9. Speed 2: Cruise Control
8. Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan
7. The Fly II
6. Weekend at Bernie's II
5. Batman and Robin
4. Blues Brothers 2000 (one reason for hating it was zombies... which I think is a reason to love it)
3. Leprechaun: Back 2 Tha' Hood
2. Caddyshack II
1. Staying Alive

And what are the best sequels?

1. Godfather Part II
2. The Empire Strikes Back
3. The Silence of the Lambs
4. Aliens
5. The Road Warrior
6. Before Sunset
7. Terminator 2: Judgment Day
8. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
9. For a Few Dollars More
10. Toy Story II

So, what do you think are the worst sequels ever made?

Posted: Mar 06 2006 06:28 pm

Hey, Conan The Destroyer wasn't bad at all. There are far worse sequels and I'm pretty sure that this was picked because some Hollywood liberals wanted to take a cheap shot at the Governator.

Ocean Twelve wasn't particularly bad either. It wasn't great, but there are some good scenes. This may not be a classic movie, but it's hardly one of the worst sequels ever.

I also think it's disingenuous to include Legally Blonde 2 and Weekend At Bernie's 2, because that would imply the original movies were somehow good.

Other than that, it's a pretty solid list. Here are some other ones that I dislike:

Look Who's Talking Too, Look Who's Talking Now
Three Men And A Little Lady
Death Wish 3
Home Alone 3
Nightmare On Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge
Halloween H20
Rocky 5
Alien 3
Alien Resurrection
Alien VS. Predator
Hannibal
Austin Powers in "Goldmember"
Police Academy 4,5,6, and Mission To Moscow
Mannequin 2: On The Move

Any sequel that gets made even though the original star refused to do it
Any sequel that gets made despite the real-life death of the original star
Any sequel that's direct to video
Any sequel that's a made-for-TV movie
Any sequel that's really a prequel
Any sequel with the words "Reloaded" or "Fully Loaded" in them.

Posted: Mar 06 2006 08:57 pm

Quote:

Other than that, it's a pretty solid list. Here are some other ones that I dislike:

Look Who's Talking Too, Look Who's Talking Now
Three Men And A Little Lady
Death Wish 3 - Damn... I haven't seen any of them yet, but I'd like to believe they're all good.
Home Alone 3
Nightmare On Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge - I support the only male lead Freddy flick. Plus, Freddy is NUTS in it. And the whole movie is pretty Brokeback.
Halloween H20
Rocky 5 - DAMN RIGHT!!
Alien 3 - There's a good movie in there and the Fincher version
Alien Resurrection
Alien VS. Predator
Hannibal
Austin Powers in "Goldmember" - The first ten minutes is better than the entire series
Police Academy 4,5,6, and Mission To Moscow
Mannequin 2: On The Move

Any sequel that gets made even though the original star refused to do it - xXx. Fast and The Furious, and many more. True this.
Any sequel that gets made despite the real-life death of the original star - Ha! CROW!
Any sequel that's direct to video EXCEPT Wishmaster IV: The Romantic Comedy. That movie was hilarious!
Any sequel that's a made-for-TV movie Paging "Last Picture Show" sequel...
Any sequel that's really a prequel I liked "Red Dragon"... =(
Any sequel with the words "Reloaded" or "Fully Loaded" in them.

Posted: Mar 06 2006 11:13 pm

Tebor wrote:

Austin Powers in "Goldmember" - The first ten minutes is better than the entire series

Yeah, that's true. Danny DeVito as Mini Me is classic.

Tebor wrote:

Any sequel that's really a prequel I liked "Red Dragon"... =(

Red Dragon was good. Hell, pretty much anything with Edward Norton is good. I was thinking more along the lines of Carlito's Way: Rise To Power and Dumb and Dumberer. Also, Red Dragon was a remake of Manhunter so it doesn't technically break the rule.

Posted: Mar 06 2006 11:14 pm

Mortal Kombat 2 was pretty bad. What with different actors playing the same characters, (Sonya) and Johnny Cage dying right at the beginning.

Posted: Mar 07 2006 12:13 am

Valdronius wrote:

Mortal Kombat 2 was pretty bad. What with different actors playing the same characters, (Sonya) and Johnny Cage dying right at the beginning.

But it happened in the game...

And the movie had Jax, an 80s superhero if I ever saw one in the 90s. Cyrax saying "Death is the only way out!". Stryker and Kabal are killed off screen... But best of all: SONYA vs. MILEENA MUD FIGHT!!! Quickly followed by Jax vs. bad CG dragon.

Posted: Mar 07 2006 11:16 am

Tebor wrote:

3. Leprechaun: Back 2 Tha' Hood

You are of course forgetting Leprechaun in Space, which somehow managed to be even worse.

Joined: Feb 24 2006 Posts: 2578

Tebor wrote:

Valdronius wrote:

Mortal Kombat 2 was pretty bad. What with different actors playing the same characters, (Sonya) and Johnny Cage dying right at the beginning.

But it happened in the game...

And the movie had Jax, an 80s superhero if I ever saw one in the 90s. Cyrax saying "Death is the only way out!". Stryker and Kabal are killed off screen... But best of all: SONYA vs. MILEENA MUD FIGHT!!! Quickly followed by Jax vs. bad CG dragon.

Sorry, MK: Annihilation definitely gets my vote for one of the worst sequels ever (evar). The first one proved to us that videogame movies could be great. Then the sequel showed us that it was just a fluke.

Also, technically Cage died at the hands of Kintaro, not Shao Kahn.

And lastly, Sandra Hess blew as Sonya.

Posted: Mar 07 2006 11:59 am

S. McCracken wrote:

You are of course forgetting Leprechaun in Space, which somehow managed to be even worse.

Leprechaun in Space came first. Back 2 Tha Hood was the 6th installment of The Guy From Willow Needs Work. Oddly enough, it was also not a direct sequel to Leprechuan 5: Leprechaun in The Hood. Leprechaun In Space was actually only the fourth movie.

Posted: Mar 07 2006 03:14 pm

I think Star Trek V: The Final Frontier fits into the "so good it's bad" category. Dawn of the Dead is also one of the worst sequels I've ever seen. I think there was a thread on this a while ago so I won't go into my reasons, but I was very disappointed by that, despite seeing Luigi and King Koopa on screen together for the first time since the Mario Bros. movie. (And if these were the only 2 movies you'd ever seen, you would assume that John Leguizamo was a better actor than Dennis Hopper since Hopper was the exact same fucking character in both movies)

Joined: Feb 24 2006 Posts: 2578

Dr. Jeebus wrote:

I think Star Trek V: The Final Frontier fits into the "so good it's bad" category. Dawn of the Dead is also one of the worst sequels I've ever seen. I think there was a thread on this a while ago so I won't go into my reasons, but I was very disappointed by that, despite seeing Luigi and King Koopa on screen together for the first time since the Mario Bros. movie. (And if these were the only 2 movies you'd ever seen, you would assume that John Leguizamo was a better actor than Dennis Hopper since Hopper was the exact same fucking character in both movies)

I think you mean Land of the Dead.

Heh. I never realized the Mario connection.

EDIT: On an unrelated note: regarding EW's list of the best sequels, "Silence of the Lambs" is NOT a sequel. Sure, the book is a sequel to Red Dragon, which was adapted into the film "Manhunter", which came out before "Silence." But "Manhunter" is separate from that series, and the film "Red Dragon" fills its place in the Anthony Hopkins Hannibaliverse.

Calling "Silence" a sequel is a bit too much like calling the 1967 "Casino Royale" a sequel to "Thunderball." Or, better still, calling "Never Say Never Again" a sequel to "Octopussy."

Rant over.

Posted: Mar 07 2006 05:16 pm

DarkMaze wrote:

Tebor wrote:

Valdronius wrote:

Mortal Kombat 2 was pretty bad. What with different actors playing the same characters, (Sonya) and Johnny Cage dying right at the beginning.

But it happened in the game...

And the movie had Jax, an 80s superhero if I ever saw one in the 90s. Cyrax saying "Death is the only way out!". Stryker and Kabal are killed off screen... But best of all: SONYA vs. MILEENA MUD FIGHT!!! Quickly followed by Jax vs. bad CG dragon.

Sorry, MK: Annihilation definitely gets my vote for one of the worst sequels ever (evar). The first one proved to us that videogame movies could be great. Then the sequel showed us that it was just a fluke.

Also, technically Cage died at the hands of Kintaro, not Shao Kahn.

And lastly, Sandra Hess blew as Sonya.

I thought Cage died right before MK3 began. Kintaro was "dead" at that point (apparently he's not dead, but I remember reading that Kintaro was killed). If it was anyone it would be Motaro... why am I even questioning this?

Agreed on the Sonya. You can't replace Jack Slater's daughter!

Posted: Mar 07 2006 05:17 pm

DarkMaze wrote:

EDIT: On an unrelated note: regarding EW's list of the best sequels, "Silence of the Lambs" is NOT a sequel. Sure, the book is a sequel to Red Dragon, which was adapted into the film "Manhunter", which came out before "Silence." But "Manhunter" is separate from that series, and the film "Red Dragon" fills its place in the Anthony Hopkins Hannibaliverse.

Calling "Silence" a sequel is a bit too much like calling the 1967 "Casino Royale" a sequel to "Thunderball." Or, better still, calling "Never Say Never Again" a sequel to "Octopussy."

Rant over.

Here's what EW had to say about it:

"Not a sequel, you say? Well, it came after 1986's Manhunter, didn't it? Trust us, the logic is airtight. So is the film."

I don't buy it either.

Joined: Feb 24 2006 Posts: 2578

Tebor wrote:

I thought Cage died right before MK3 began. Kintaro was "dead" at that point (apparently he's not dead, but I remember reading that Kintaro was killed). If it was anyone it would be Motaro... why am I even questioning this?

I may be wrong. According to Wikipdedia (which I usually don't trust much further than I can throw), he was killed by Kahn's extermination squads.

Posted: Mar 07 2006 06:40 pm

Here are some screenshots from the MK3 arcade attract mode that may help a little bit:

So there you go. Johnny Cage may have been killed in Kahn's original soul purge. If not, then he was killed by the extermination squads which were led by Motaro. Johnny's fate is never specifically mentioned in the game, however. As for Raiden, there is an intro where he says he cannot interfere in the battle for Earth.

MK has always been an interesting franchise because the fans are left to piece together the mythology for themselves. That, or ask Ed Boon.

Posted: Mar 07 2006 08:52 pm

We must consult MK Trilogy!

Posted: Mar 08 2006 02:38 am

The way I understood it, he was killed but his soul wasn't able to pass on, so unlike Scorpion he reinvigorated into his body.

Posted: Mar 08 2006 03:01 am

lordsathien wrote:

The way I understood it, he was killed but his soul wasn't able to pass on, so unlike Scorpion he reinvigorated into his body.

But who killed him!?

Posted: Mar 08 2006 06:12 am

I'm Like 3 days late, but i don't give a damn

The worst sequeal i have ever say was Wayne's World 2
It not only spewed chucnks ("if your gonna spew *unfolds a paper cup for mcdusher* spew into this") It commited the cardinal sin of not being cool like the first movie was

Posted: Mar 08 2006 07:27 pm

Gushoshin wrote:

I'm Like 3 days late, but i don't give a damn

The worst sequeal i have ever say was Wayne's World 2
It not only spewed chucnks ("if your gonna spew *unfolds a paper cup for mcdusher* spew into this") It commited the cardinal sin of not being cool like the first movie was

I'm a fan of the second because of:

WALKEN

And that random Ninja fight. And Aerosmith is way better than Alice Cooper* (debatable).

Posted: Mar 09 2006 12:39 am

Walkin was in that?????

Shows you how long its been since i seen it

I gotta give it to you, walken DOES ROCK

Joined: Apr 30 2006 Location: Helsinki Posts: 87

Shittiest sequel ever : American Psycho 2

It ripped the original movies name, and while American Psycho was way lamer
than the book, it was still amusing.

I can never get bored of the scene where Bateman kills Paul with Axe and
"Hip to be square" plays in background

"Try to get a reservation at Dorsia now you stupid sonuvabitch ! "

Hilarious.